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OnlyAvailableID's favorite FMLs
Today, my family and I finished moving to Texas. As if that isn't bad enough, I'll have to introduce myself all over again to everyone I meet and explain that yes, my parents really did name me Lilypad. FML
by Anonymous / 11/28/2013 at 11:53am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML
by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health
by Anonymous / 11/22/2013 at 3:51pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was offered a job that pays far more than I expected, being a high school senior. My parents decided they aren't letting me take the job, saying I should enjoy my childhood. They're also not paying for my college, which is why I was looking for work in the first place. FML
by Remy / 11/16/2013 at 6:39pm / United States (Oregon) / Work
by gonnafail / 11/16/2013 at 3:18pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/15/2013 at 8:15pm / India (Gujarat) / Miscellaneous
by myheadhurts / 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
by queenxalee / 11/11/2013 at 6:58pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by shut up. / 11/11/2013 at 5:36am / New Zealand / Work
Today, my girlfriend "got even" with me after an argument by telling people that I've been beating her. Three guys later came over to my place and beat the crap out of me. Her reaction: "I didn't think they'd take it so serious!" FML
by JayDNut / 11/08/2013 at 4:17pm / Health
by cricketsins / 11/07/2013 at 10:33pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML
by Anonymous / 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm / United Kingdom (Derry) / Miscellaneous
by maddie / 11/06/2013 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Something I said? / 11/05/2013 at 10:26am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
- Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with… Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an… Today, I realized I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Too bad he has never once made me…