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OctoberJade

Offline (the 11/21/2014 at 12:39am) | Search for a member

OctoberJade

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2806
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About OctoberJade : Message me if you wanna know anything!

OctoberJade's page activity

Visits<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 4:42pm<b>nesscafe</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 9:08am<b>Tbearshy</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:19am<b>charlielowe</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 6:21am<b>YellowKettleBell</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 11:18pm<b>slingingslasher</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 1:20am<b>imbackwiththeshi</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 9:33pm<b>Ben009</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 12:04am<b>Han1156</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 11:23pm<b>gshocker20</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 10:56pm<b>sunshine41196</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 12:47pm<b>Comet_Candy</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 7:15pm<b>Tucking_Fypo</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:34am<b>Trollx</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 12:37pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 7:44am<b>livin11</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 2:15am

OctoberJade's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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See all of OctoberJade's badges

OctoberJade's favorite FMLs

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38536) - you deserved it (10850)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52709) - you deserved it (10544)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43722) - you deserved it (16621)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I complained to the train company online. I filled in information and added several photos as evidence. I only realised later that the photos I attached were nudes. FML

#21202786
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26592) - you deserved it (59506)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by anona (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I came home and saw my cat all snuggled up with another cat on the sofa. I thought it was the cutest thing ever, until I remembered that I only have one cat. FML

#21191841
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42952) - you deserved it (4759)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, after having asked me out on Monday, the guy I like angrily cancelled our date because I "hadn't bothered" even talking to him for "several days". One day. You didn't hear from me on Monday. It's now Tuesday. That's one day, dick. FML

#21169704
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47746) - you deserved it (6387)

On 06/10/2014 at 2:29pm - love - by fartbucket51995129565 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, I didn't pay enough attention while sending a music file to be used in a powerful video my class-mates and I made about the Syrian civil war. Instead of a moving classical track, viewers were shown graphic scenes of devastation to the tune of Gangnam Style. FML

#21128082
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24143) - you deserved it (35000)

On 05/01/2014 at 4:10pm - work - by Mortifiedcharityworker (woman) - Austria

Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML

#21123743
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40168) - you deserved it (6737)

On 04/26/2014 at 7:29pm - work - by caught out - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am not a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML

#21122879
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32716) - you deserved it (12807)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my teenage daughter tried to convince me that the UK is a part of Canada. After I pulled out a map to prove her wrong, she got all angry and defensive, and said that nobody's perfect at "geometry". My daughter is an idiot. FML

#21122867
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49909) - you deserved it (9967)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from 3rd grade and figured out how to play the highest pitch note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of ibuprofen. FML

#21121712
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36693) - you deserved it (4995)

On 04/24/2014 at 11:28am - kids - by missmom83 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my drug addict of a roommate convinced herself my red kitten was Pennywise the clown in disguise waiting to kill her, and hit him over the head with a pan. FML

Today, at my wedding, my husband stood up to give a speech. It started out beautiful, until he told everyone how he started to fall in love with me after I blew him on our first date. FML

#21118892
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54187) - you deserved it (13440)

On 04/21/2014 at 11:43am - intimacy - by Sue Ellen (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)



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