Noah98

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Offline (the 02/19/2015 at 6:32am)

Noah98

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 May 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 549
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Noah98's page activity

Visits<b>Damafia</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 8:11am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 11:34pm<b>jessicawalgren</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 2:41am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 8:45am<b>Jeeper4Life</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 11:25am<b>JakeMagMan</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 7:44am<b>xfireds</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 8:11am<b>imbatmanfir</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 1:59am<b>SaintGoobers</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 7:10pm<b>appletreee</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 3:26pm<b>Cherryta</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:45pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 10:50am

Noah98's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Noah98's badges

Noah98's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2014 at 3:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I celebrated my 22nd birthday. On my cake stood last year's "21" candle, to which had been added a single candle. Clearly, times are tough. FML

by cheap / 06/18/2014 at 9:42am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Money

Today, I learned the valuable lesson that taking care of a baby crow isn't the best idea. He finally can fly away, but sits on my porch all day cawing for food. FML

by a very unlucky dude. / 06/18/2014 at 2:37am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend bought yet another video game and played it all afternoon. Unlike me, our parrot is taking this situation rather well: for the past two hours he's been repeating, over and over, "EA Sports, it's in the game." FML

by Apcn / 06/05/2014 at 4:05pm / France (Bretagne) / Animals

Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML

by idiot says "you raised him" / 05/31/2014 at 5:30pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my mother-in-law came over for dinner. She decided to salt the food I was preparing without even tasting it first, then complained at dinner that I'd used too much salt. She then lectured me on the proper seasoning of food for the rest of the evening. FML

by NaCl / 05/24/2014 at 5:20pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I collected my students' final essays. One of them submitted a printout of a screenshot he took with his phone. Too bad a browser address bar was still in the shot, along with a "click to read more" link at the bottom. My students are too dumb and lazy to even plagiarize properly. FML

by What am I doing with my life? / 05/22/2014 at 12:47pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML

by wtf / 05/16/2014 at 6:25pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

by Anon / 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

Today, while on a road trip through Australia with my dad, we were both complaining that we had yet to see any kangaroos. Suddenly, we saw one up real close. The rental car saw it even closer. FML

by australian6196 / 02/04/2014 at 9:36pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Animals

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML

by myheadhurts / 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

by #isthisthepoundkey? / 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I accidentally left some music playing on my iPad, then left to do some errands. When I came back, I found it smashed into a million pieces. Apparently, grandpa couldn't find any other way to "shut off that goddamn music." FML

by MsGlaDos / 06/12/2013 at 5:45pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous