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Ninelives's FML badges
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Ninelives's favorite FMLs
Today, I got the feeling that my phone smelt of cigarettes and B.O. I smelt it, realised that it was my hands that smelt, then got confused and thought maybe it was my nose piercing that smelt. I then realised my psychology class was watching me trying to smell my own nose. FML
by Cass / 03/28/2012 at 10:03pm / Australia / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/29/2011 at 5:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Kevin / 12/29/2011 at 2:32pm / France / Miscellaneous
Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML
by Aly / 12/09/2011 at 10:40am / United States / Intimacy
by cantstoplaughing / 10/06/2010 at 12:32am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend saying, "I shall be the prince, and you shall be the princess," to his hamster. Once he saw me, he quickly turned to the hamster and said, "I have to go. The dragon is here." FML
by Cheese4men / 05/14/2010 at 7:28pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by ChubbyTubby / 01/17/2010 at 1:13pm / United States (Georgia) / Geek
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- Today, I was called handsome. Too bad it was coming from a trashed homeless lady, who then went on… Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. He got on the bed on all fours… Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over…