NeatNit

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NeatNit

55Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 29538
  • Number of comments : 1099
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About NeatNit : Hi. I know what you're thinking - you want my hat. This hat is mine; If you want it, you're going to have to pry it from my cold, dead airholes.

NeatNit's page activity

Visits<b>optimusic</b> - the 09/22/2016 at 8:28am<b>atradr</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 10:08pm<b>VHNox</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 4:52pm<b>heirofhope</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 2:14pm<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 12:01pm<b>ThePerry</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 3:06am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 5:05pm<b>mas12806</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 12:56pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 5:51pm<b>Fennex3</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 6:16pm<b>TheBestAround23</b> - the 09/05/2016 at 11:16am<b>Undecidednumber</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 1:05pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 9:03pm<b>jordynMKD</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 5:32pm<b>JustStella</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 4:24am<b>classicate</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 4:15am<b>JBChristian</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 5:26pm<b>coyotefox</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 2:18pm

Fucked!<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 6:01pm<b>Undecidednumber</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 7:05pm<b>classicate</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 10:10am<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:10am<b>jackthekeeper</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 8:21am<b>billcosby31</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 3:29am<b>psychoIogical</b> - the 06/01/2016 at 3:41am<b>bruhwhy</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 5:14pm<b>thatguy206</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 8:01pm<b>Skydiver2001</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 10:13pm<b>samiam_123</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 12:38pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 5:32pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 2:17pm<b>hfudge</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 11:56pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 6:03pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 5:11am<b>zach205</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 8:40pm<b>zevida</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 6:26am

NeatNit's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of NeatNit's badges

NeatNit's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML

by Anonyme / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / France (Lorraine) / Animals

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

by crop circle galore / 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm / United States / Work

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

by thoughthewasjoking / 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm / United States (Alabama) / Money

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML

by We raised that fool / 08/06/2014 at 9:21am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Kids

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

by Ballsy427 / 07/25/2014 at 8:05am / United States (Armed Forces Pacific) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2014 at 12:04pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2014 at 1:52pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

by failed dad / 06/25/2014 at 8:30am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids

Today, my daughter admitted why her grades, which are usually straight A's, have been slipping the past few weeks. Turns out she has been deliberately failing tests to avoid becoming valedictorian, so she won't have to deliver a speech at graduation. FML

by stillaproudfather / 05/22/2014 at 3:24pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was chewed out by a lady who claimed the laptop she bought wouldn't turn on, and that she wanted a refund. She yelled and shoved the laptop at me, not even listening when I told her I didn't even work at that store. FML

by lemongrab / 05/18/2014 at 10:14am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend decided that we won't be having any more sex until I beat her ridiculously high score on Flappy Bird. FML

by (not) fucked / 05/16/2014 at 12:01pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML

by salad / 04/28/2014 at 11:38am / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous