Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MzZombicidal

Online | Search for a member

MzZombicidal

126Fucked!

MzZombicidalMzZombicidal
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 October 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13398
  • Number of comments : 846
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 34 posted

About MzZombicidal : Hey! My name's Kristine and I love this website.
[ feminist / 22 / taken / gamer / employed / artist ] ت

I like The Hulk and pugs.

Do you have an Xbox? You should send me your GT!

Instagram: im.pulchritudinous

Don't be shy! Go on ahead and message me!
♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡

(P.S. Thanks for the fucks?) (T∇T)

If any of you truly feel your life is a bit too sad for FML, try Vent! It's a wonderful app for... Venting! The community is friendly and the creators are constantly tweaking and updating the app for US! ♡ I hope it helps!

MzZombicidal's page activity

Visits<b>Motocrosskid87</b> - 8 hours ago<b>BunchieRules</b> - 8 hours ago<b>python199</b> - 17 hours ago<b>PePziNL</b> - 18 hours ago<b>mds9986</b> - 19 hours ago<b>Varieus</b> - 19 hours ago<b>jokesonyou1</b> - yesterday at 2:46am<b>Codezlol</b> - yesterday at 5:20pm<b>khoov19</b> - yesterday at 4:16pm<b>Kevin_angel</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 2:22pm<b>OSHH2000</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 2:14pm<b>gopi</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 2:06pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 7:36am<b>Artigedude65</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 5:20am<b>ENCOURAGER</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 9:57pm<b>brandonwong</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 9:00pm<b>bchin1220</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 1:46pm<b>2high4u</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 1:33am

Fucked!<b>brandonwong</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:57am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 2:19am<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:50am<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 12:27am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 4:42pm<b>zarrganaut</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 4:27am<b>pop17123</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 5:20am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 12:50am<b>TRENZ</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 7:23am<b>theBandit68</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 6:08am<b>fastman19</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 4:51am<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 2:28am<b>jmon707</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 2:08am<b>Angsty_Armadillo</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 11:53pm<b>keiNan</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 10:26am<b>beckamoosee</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:38am<b>DFMLharsh</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 9:39pm<b>taylorzgoines</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 8:59pm

MzZombicidal's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of MzZombicidal's badges

MzZombicidal's favorite FMLs

Today, I called my mum, crying because of my low self-esteem. She interrupted my sobs by saying, "Can I hang up now? The phone's getting hot." FML

#19567483
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21768) - you deserved it (5518)

On 05/03/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, while I was at work in a machine shop, I cut myself really bad. Not by any sharp tools, drills, or metals I work with. Just the soap dispenser. FML

#19535825
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18463) - you deserved it (3834)

On 04/27/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Bullocks (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML

#19527572
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24438) - you deserved it (1977)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:46pm - misc - by :| (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML

#19526031
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22021) - you deserved it (2695)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:46am - work - by foshizzle (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized just how awful my relationships have been when I discovered I emotionally connect with women on Jerry Springer. FML

#19511364
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17469) - you deserved it (5114)

On 04/22/2012 at 2:14pm - love - by Coquette (woman) - United States

Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML

#19508765
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23043) - you deserved it (4106)

On 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm - health - by JurassicHole (man) - United States

Today, I surprised my daughter by telling her that I'm going to treat the family to a trip to the Himalayas in a few months. She promptly threw a tantrum and listed her main reasons for not wanting us to go: "It's a freaking desert there," and, "I'll miss the new Spiderman movie." FML

#19463259
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25030) - you deserved it (3935)

On 04/13/2012 at 9:01pm - kids - by neverakid (man) - United States

Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML

#19455819
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30937) - you deserved it (19270)

On 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by CantPublish - United States (California)

Today, while lying in bed, I heard a strange grating noise coming from the hallway. After recovering from my initial assumption that it was a poltergeist come to murder me and steal my liver, I went out to investigate. It was there that I discovered my bulldog casually eating into the wall. FML

Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML

#19312458
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5361) - you deserved it (28577)

On 03/20/2012 at 4:16am - misc - by argh (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was shaving naked in my cold bathroom before showering. My wife walked up behind me, yelled "Shrinkage!" and flicked the head of my penis as hard as she could. FML

#19261628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31172) - you deserved it (4109)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided he is going to narrate everything I do. I can't get him to stop. FML

#19201903
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23197) - you deserved it (3345)

On 03/02/2012 at 10:01am - misc - by types (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to shave my balls. When I was finished, I vacuumed up the mess on the carpet, and then the fragments of hair still on my balls. Very bad idea. FML

#19196549
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9264) - you deserved it (55746) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/01/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by BadIdea - France

Today, I was talking to a friend about how many germs live on the average cell phone. My five year old son apparently overheard me talking, and decided to give my cell phone a bath. FML

#19066123
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25797) - you deserved it (5934)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:23pm - kids - by Katherine - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I sneezed after watching a commercial involving dust. FML

#19016688
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18780) - you deserved it (6382)

On 02/07/2012 at 7:04am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: