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MzZombicidal

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MzZombicidal
  • Town/Country : Sue happy, America
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 October 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 2962
  • Number of comments : 358
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 15 posted

About MzZombicidal : Howdy there! Feel free to take a look around! I'm Kristine (pronouced Kris-teen), 21, in a serious relationship, extremely obsessed with sloths and zombies, and currently addicted to Call of Duty: Ghosts. Feel free to add me on Xbox: Mz Zombicidal :)

MzZombicidal's last visitors

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One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

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MzZombicidal's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45385) - you deserved it (6890)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while on my way to work, an elderly woman complimented me on my breast cancer scarf. I explained that my grandmother made one for all her female grandchildren before passing away two years ago. The woman then went psycho and almost strangled me in an attempt to steal it. FML

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

#20988758
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39743) - you deserved it (6307)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while trying to break up with my girlfriend, I somehow ended up begging her not to break up with me. I'm still not sure how that happened. FML

#20988052
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35201) - you deserved it (17596)

On 12/10/2013 at 6:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Bangladesh

Today, I taught a college course with a group of 30 adults. I was educating them on leadership and gave a 25 minute lecture, with examples like Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King, and how they changed the world. Then I opened the forum to see who inspired them. The response? Donald Trump. FML

#20987886
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30186) - you deserved it (3994)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:32pm - misc - by Disappointed Teacher (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, marks my third day of school being closed due to snow. One, and only one, of the teachers has decided that we have to do work online in the meantime. I just so happen to be in three of his classes. FML

#20987643
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38573) - you deserved it (3826)

On 12/10/2013 at 12:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, at my job as a night janitor, at which I work alone, I saw an old man enter a bathroom. When I went to investigate, it was completely empty. I'm now scared to work. FML

#20987406
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51178) - you deserved it (2912)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:50am - work - by scared shitless (man) - United States (California)

Today, my band members and I were brainstorming ideas to help increase our fan base. My drummer suggested they replace me for someone attractive. Everyone agreed and now they are trying to kick me out of the band I started. FML

#20986659
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43261) - you deserved it (2957)

On 12/09/2013 at 6:25pm - misc - by YouAssholes - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML

#20985907
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44026) - you deserved it (2850)

On 12/09/2013 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as a pickup line, a guy said to me, "Yo, can I kiss your vag' under the mistletoe?" FML

#20985559
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43745) - you deserved it (3365)

On 12/08/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by mistletoe (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

#20982965
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45661) - you deserved it (3913)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my grandma commented on my Facebook profile picture: "That's a great photo! It doesn't look anything like you!" FML

#20982946
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34335) - you deserved it (3114)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by oh (woman) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML

#20975537
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46011) - you deserved it (9794)

On 11/30/2013 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Jack - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
101 comments

Today, I overheard my parents talking about me and discussing how I've never had a boyfriend. My mum laughed that maybe they should pay someone to go out with me, and my dad replied, "Heh, not enough money in the world." FML

#20974977
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45032) - you deserved it (3139)

On 11/29/2013 at 5:27pm - love - by katerina (woman) - United Kingdom



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