Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MzZombicidal

Online | Search for a member

MzZombicidal

136Fucked!

MzZombicidalMzZombicidal
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 October 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14215
  • Number of comments : 869
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 35 posted

About MzZombicidal : Hey! My name's Kristine and I love this website.
[ feminist / 22 / taken / gamer / employed / artist ] ت

I like The Hulk and pugs.

Do you have an Xbox? You should send me your GT!

Instagram: im.pulchritudinous

Don't be shy! Go on ahead and message me!
♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡

(P.S. Thanks for the fucks?) (T∇T)

If any of you truly feel your life is a bit too sad for FML, try Vent! It's a wonderful app for... Venting! The community is friendly and the creators are constantly tweaking and updating the app for US! ♡ I hope it helps!

MzZombicidal's page activity

Visits<b>MissJennyale</b> - 13 hours ago<b>Atrocities</b> - 14 hours ago<b>BlazefireSaber</b> - 14 hours ago<b>jqmalang</b> - 21 hours ago<b>SOILEDIT</b> - yesterday at 11:09am<b>QBChris43</b> - yesterday at 10:54am<b>Helios309</b> - yesterday at 4:25am<b>dogshorsescats</b> - yesterday at 10:59pm<b>anujt360</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 10:34am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 2:43am<b>Umbraelux</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:51am<b>NotLemon</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 12:51pm<b>VolcanoTheDragon</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 9:29am<b>getindoe69</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 5:03am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 5:00pm<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:47am<b>nfedrichy</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 5:22pm<b>moron011</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:05pm

Fucked!<b>anujt360</b> - yesterday at 4:34pm<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 8:44am<b>getindoe69</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 11:03am<b>nfedrichy</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 11:22pm<b>QBChris43</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 4:49pm<b>docsnow84</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 2:01am<b>WellThatWasRude</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 7:28pm<b>dudeguy1989</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 3:08pm<b>Mar2171</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 2:34pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 4:20am<b>brandonwong</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:57am<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 2:19am<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:50am<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 12:27am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 4:42pm<b>zarrganaut</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 4:27am<b>pop17123</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 5:20am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 12:50am

MzZombicidal's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of MzZombicidal's badges

MzZombicidal's favorite FMLs

Today, as if having an old man shit on the floor of the busy restaurant I work at wasn't bad enough, my manager made a video commentating over the camera footage of me discovering said giant pile of shit, and shared it with the entire staff. This is going to haunt me forever. FML

Today, I was on a date, and I tried breaking the ice by telling him my best joke. He laughed hysterically for a good 10 seconds, started beating the table with his fist, then suddenly went deadpan and said "No, seriously, you're a moron. Screw this date." FML

#21446581
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26239) - you deserved it (2731)

On 07/24/2015 at 2:54pm - misc - by HAIL SITHIS (woman) - United States

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML

#21439825
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27659) - you deserved it (2383)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I heard my 2-year-old sister crying, so I left my room to comfort her. She looked at me, held my hand, escorted me back to my room and closed the door. FML

#21392817
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30918) - you deserved it (2850)

On 04/13/2015 at 6:46am - kids - by transcendingnerd (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, after many tests and doctor visits, I finally found out the reason for my flu-like symptoms isn't a vitamin deficient or anything. The damn tea I drink every morning makes me feel sick. FML

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

#21346857
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35828) - you deserved it (3711)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my sister asked me how my boyfriend was doing. He died two years ago. She was the first person I told. FML

#21346806
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29954) - you deserved it (2205)

On 01/30/2015 at 1:11pm - misc - by lonesomegal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

#21346279
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29971) - you deserved it (13191)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after I got home from a long day at work. I go inside my room and find a life-size cut out of Miley Cyrus. I don't know how it got here. I'm the only person with a key to my apartment. FML

#21345231
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28905) - you deserved it (1992)

On 01/27/2015 at 6:46pm - misc - by I'm screwed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML

#21342882
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31444) - you deserved it (4433)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:12pm - misc - by Annomymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my crush was giving me a ride home. As we pulled up to my house, he looked into my eyes with a sweet smile and said the words every girl wants to hear - "Do you give head?" FML

#21339980
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38403) - you deserved it (6057)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:35am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom paid me a surprise visit me at my university dorm. She ended up rifling through my stuff and started to pull out a box from on top of my wardrobe. Before I could stop her, it slipped and fell. Today's forecast: 100% chance of dildo rain. FML

#21338507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31895) - you deserved it (4530)

On 01/16/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking with a female friend when suddenly, my ex-girlfriend comes running down the street and says, "So, you're cheating on me with this slut, huh?!" We've been separated for a decade now. FML

#21336664
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37556) - you deserved it (2674)

On 01/13/2015 at 10:05pm - love - by RipeFlame - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband confessed that when he's angry with me, he uses my makeup sponge to apply his hemorrhoid cream. FML

#21336401
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34151) - you deserved it (3929)

On 01/13/2015 at 12:42pm - love - by Maiar (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: