About MyUsernameKatie : Well, I'm back! I've missed the FML community but they didn't miss me. Anyway, feel free to message me to learn more about me. I like talking to and meeting new people.
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MyUsernameKatie's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/22/2013 at 3:08pm / Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain) / Miscellaneous
by Oops / 06/10/2013 at 7:22am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/09/2013 at 10:29am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, my idiot horse decided to grab a mouthful of stinging nettles while I was riding him. He panicked at the burning sensation in his mouth and bucked me off. Don't worry, though, my fall was cushioned, by the nettles. FML
by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 9:25am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML
by assoutofuandme / 02/14/2013 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML
by mm / 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United Kingdom (Warrington) / Miscellaneous
by CircusSea / 11/04/2012 at 7:02pm / Puerto Rico / Work
by geena / 10/27/2012 at 2:42am / United States (Illinois) / Work
Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML
by stoych / 10/08/2012 at 3:14am / United Kingdom / Love
Today, I discovered how pathetically introverted I am when during a car ride with my family, I said, "I really like this song" and my parents gasped because they didn't realize I was in the back seat. And I'm their only child. FML
by mississippi123 / 08/06/2012 at 1:41am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Scabby / 04/11/2012 at 5:53am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Health
by stinkyhair / 12/19/2011 at 12:48pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by tishihish / 12/12/2011 at 12:15am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was napping. I woke up to my pillow making some sounds. Thinking it was my head shifting my pillow, I went back to sleep. Later on I woke up to the sounds again, and a mouse staring at my face. FML
by pinkjade / 10/25/2011 at 3:17am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals
Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML
by kemando / 10/06/2011 at 6:20am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He… Today, after 9 months in our relationship, my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. We… Today, I was handling corrosive chemicals when I accidentally spilled a beaker of Hydrochloric Acid…