Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MyUsernameKatie

Offline (20 hours ago) | Search for a member

MyUsernameKatie

5Fucked!

MyUsernameKatieMyUsernameKatie
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1715
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About MyUsernameKatie : Well, I'm back! I've missed the FML community but they didn't miss me. Anyway, feel free to message me to learn more about me. I like talking to and meeting new people.

MyUsernameKatie's page activity

Visits<b>myeviltwin</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 6:59pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:28am<b>metalscales</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 8:26am<b>snydeeli000</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 1:26pm<b>aruden</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:18pm<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 3:06am<b>DFMLharsh</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 1:46am<b>rhino514</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 11:40pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 10:55pm<b>GoshDude1352</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 9:28am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 9:46pm<b>Futebol_Queen11</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:41am<b>gavdarv</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 5:50am<b>DreadedSamurai</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 11:00am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 7:33am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 1:29am<b>sleepisweak</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 11:53pm<b>vikky538</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 7:47am

Fucked!<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 9:06am<b>DreadedSamurai</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 12:51am<b>sleepisweak</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 5:33pm<b>Mezzacarina</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 11:28pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 12:20pm

MyUsernameKatie's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of MyUsernameKatie's badges

MyUsernameKatie's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally told my father that I was picked on at college all this year over my hearing disability. When I told him one of the jokes they made about me, he burst out into an uncontrollable fit of laughter. FML

#20999250
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39883) - you deserved it (3011)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I sang a romantic song I wrote for my girlfriend. She laughed at my soprano. FML

#20996292
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36664) - you deserved it (7771)

On 12/17/2013 at 8:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, while at the gym, I noticed a creepy-looking guy watching me. When I got up from the equipment, I noticed that he sniffed the seat. I didn't say anything the first time. After he did it the second time, I asked him to stop. He bent down and sniffed it without breaking eye contact. FML

#20996147
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47517) - you deserved it (3507)

On 12/17/2013 at 6:48pm - misc - by gymgirl - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at a Christmas party when I noticed someone had taken all of the cash I had from out of my wallet. It was a family gathering. I'm related to the culprit but have no idea who it is. FML

#20994219
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39823) - you deserved it (2914)

On 12/15/2013 at 11:47pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I used my vaporiser to make my house smell like lavender while I went to work. My brother thought it would be funny to pee inside it. My whole house now smells like pissy lavender. FML

#20993906
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39231) - you deserved it (3538)

On 12/15/2013 at 9:04pm - kids - by lavenderpiss (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

#20991978
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54522) - you deserved it (7508)

On 12/14/2013 at 2:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them and told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed 'cause I haven't gotten laid. FML

#20984257
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48662) - you deserved it (4554)

On 12/07/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by bella - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom said I should start wearing push up bras to make myself look better. I was wearing one when she said that. FML

#20976101
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41037) - you deserved it (3481)

On 11/30/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by flatchested Sam - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML

#20975844
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47823) - you deserved it (6765)

On 11/30/2013 at 2:21pm - money - by yulis (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I slept over at my friend's house. Her dad made breakfast for us. While fixing a plate, my friend said, "Careful, my dad clips his nails in the kitchen." She said it with a sarcastic, joking tone, and laughed afterwards. While eating, I found a toenail in my food. Her response? "I told you." FML

#20926236
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46102) - you deserved it (5079)

On 10/19/2013 at 11:04am - misc - by sleepysophie (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I asked my students to buy a copy of Anne Frank's diary for an assignment. One of them asked me in all seriousness who wrote it. FML

#20925665
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44702) - you deserved it (4664) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/18/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by Huedadaa - France (Picardie)

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

#20908715
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45117) - you deserved it (3814)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:34pm - animals - by animal lover... -

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56494) - you deserved it (6393)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend posted a screenshot from a porno on my Facebook, because the girl in it looked freakishly similar to me. My dad commented, asking for a link to the video. FML

#20797729
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52629) - you deserved it (4076)

On 07/22/2013 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, my friend got dumped. I wanted to say, "You must be devastated", thinking, "That really sucks." I said, "You must really suck." FML

#20717146
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44206) - you deserved it (12821)

On 06/10/2013 at 7:22am - misc - by Oops (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: