MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

234Fucked!

MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 36242
  • Number of comments : 2321
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 19. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>The12thPaladin</b> - yesterday at 10:22am<b>billcosby31</b> - yesterday at 3:10pm<b>xxdreamloverxx</b> - yesterday at 2:51pm<b>Miss_Whipped</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 4:01pm<b>LiquidGoldRose</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 6:09pm<b>DarkLink9001</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 10:21pm<b>Infamous_Pickle</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 9:13pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 5:04pm<b>kateunder11111</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 8:19am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 1:20pm<b>IAm123</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 10:31pm<b>cuz803</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 2:51pm<b>talon327</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 9:31pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 2:31pm<b>hoponpip</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 2:27pm<b>Diamond_don</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 12:20am<b>meagan77</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 11:36pm<b>whosthedeadone</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 2:16am

Fucked!<b>billcosby31</b> - yesterday at 9:10pm<b>cuz803</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 8:51pm<b>whosthedeadone</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 8:17am<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 12:15pm<b>Infamous_Pickle</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 5:05am<b>seba7236</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 7:19am<b>Pikawarrior</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 12:19pm<b>airriderz15</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 9:37pm<b>toolazytotype99</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 9:04pm<b>tintarroja</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 8:17am<b>BakedBanana</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 4:44am<b>walker9879</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 4:26pm<b>Goat_E_mom</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 10:06pm<b>AirMelon</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 7:39am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 11:58am<b>Natttie</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:51pm<b>JETarchitect</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 2:42pm<b>ima_rock</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:25am

MrSassypants's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I sliced my finger on a frozen chicken cutlet. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2015 at 4:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2015 at 5:03am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I drove to my cousin's house so he could help me fix my broken tail light. On the way there, I got pulled over for having a broken tail light. FML

by nozVail / 11/20/2015 at 6:52pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML

by brokeasscollegelife / 11/20/2015 at 4:25pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I found out my fiancé is already married when his wife showed up at my door. That's about the same time she found her husband is gay, and that Ashley can be a man's name. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2015 at 9:43am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I'm 4ft9 "tall" and I always have trouble reaching things that are high up. It's my birthday, and I got three footstools as gifts. FML

by mini matthylde / 11/19/2015 at 4:57am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss asked me if I'd realized that "I support ISIS" was written on the bottom of my water bottle. The bottle was a gift from my dad. FML

by Secret Isis supporter / 11/18/2015 at 7:52pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I read the instructions on my new prescription constipation medicine: "For best results, defecate before use." FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2015 at 9:50am / Canada / Health

Today, I took a picture of the combination to my new lock so I would always have it on my phone if I ever forgot it. I put my phone in my gym locker, locked it with the new lock, then promptly forgot the combination. FML

by mmoments / 11/17/2015 at 2:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at a family dinner, my mom announced that my newborn brother was named after his father. His name is Kevin. My dad's name is Michael. FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2015 at 3:23am / Maldives (Maale) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got out of bed, soaked up the beautiful sunlight, and went to the kitchen to make some coffee. I saw my dad rummaging through the fridge, shirtless and one ball poking through his underwear. I needed to see that about as much as I need ass cancer. FML

by eyegouger15 / 11/13/2015 at 11:32am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally overcame depression-induced writer's block. I was typing at a good speed and before I knew it had over a thousand words that I was reasonably proud of. Then I woke up. FML

by blackonblight / 11/11/2015 at 6:23am / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I fractured my shinbone after slipping on a leaf. FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2015 at 6:03am / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, a notification from Tinder popped up on my girlfriend's phone, 'Congratulations, you have a new match'. FML

by anon / 11/10/2015 at 10:28pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth worked on. I got tongue-tied and instead of asking if they could anesthetize me, I accidentally asked if they could euthanize me. FML

by EnderHorse / 11/05/2015 at 3:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Health