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MrSassypants

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MrSassypants

155Fucked!

MrSassypantsMrSassypants
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 30325
  • Number of comments : 2196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About MrSassypants : Hello there! My, oh my, don't you look good today!? Dang, male/female/human/alien/4thDimensional creature visiting my profile, you look stunning!

Anyways, my name is Kevin, and I use this app when I am bored, meaning all the time so I'm online often.

Well I lied on my profile and said I am about 23 years old. I am 19. Sorry I am a filthy liar. You should call me and tell me how much of a filthy boy I am. My number is: 012-345-6789.

MrSassypants's page activity

Visits<b>Ajax_Teh_Great</b> - 9 hours ago<b>TheTshirt</b> - 14 hours ago<b>iYamEmoRay</b> - yesterday at 11:35am<b>apineapple</b> - yesterday at 11:30pm<b>black_day</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 8:58pm<b>Neverafter</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 4:55pm<b>Zak_Attack00</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:51pm<b>stargazing</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 12:21pm<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:50am<b>DMA0712</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 7:26am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 3:47am<b>oakcrush</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 9:10pm<b>taterrtots</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:07pm<b>krismarie524</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 7:52pm<b>Zelphoric</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 11:34pm<b>CatherL</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 6:51pm<b>Malfano0214</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 10:20pm<b>toenails10</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 1:42pm

Fucked!<b>xKrisSmoove</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 7:31pm<b>qsxsqsxs</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:40am<b>I_Like_Dogs</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:24pm<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:57pm<b>luridz</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 4:37am<b>schindler12345</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 3:50am<b>BWAHA</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 10:40pm<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:34pm<b>leafynitemare</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 11:24am<b>JessiPark</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 1:52am<b>MissEris</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:28pm<b>bobby0000000</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 2:00am<b>Baka_Me</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 9:31am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 4:10am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 2:37pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 7:13am<b>AnonymousBella</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:40am<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:08pm

MrSassypants's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of MrSassypants's badges

MrSassypants's favorite FMLs

Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she let out a blood-curdling scream. Turned out she'd searched for My Little Pony pictures and stumbled upon a drawing of Rainbow Dash giving another pony a blowjob. FML

#21463707
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18617) - you deserved it (3105)

On 09/02/2015 at 11:26am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, at soccer, I repeatedly asked my coach for water as I was feeling light headed. His response every time was, "5 more minutes". Eventually, I got so dehydrated that I passed out. The first thing my coach said when I woke up was, "Why didn't you get some water?" FML

#21463299
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23383) - you deserved it (2060)

On 09/01/2015 at 7:07am - health - by Dehydrated - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to pull chunks of digested blanket out of my dog's ass because she refuses to listen to me when I tell her not to eat the damn blanket. I can't stop smelling it. FML

Today, I thought the girl I was seeing was going to tell me that she loved me. Instead, she told me how she sucked some other guy's dick. FML

#21462923
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23238) - you deserved it (1754)

On 08/31/2015 at 9:16am - intimacy - by FuckThis (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

#21462545
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27450) - you deserved it (2112)

On 08/30/2015 at 11:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I realized I could make more money being on welfare than I can at my current job. FML

Today, I went to my fiance's cousin's wedding with him. I got drunk and danced like a stripper in front of his entire extended family, who I'd just met that day. FML

#21461344
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9502) - you deserved it (27925)

On 08/27/2015 at 1:44pm - love - by O0hdear - United States (Texas)

Today, on my daughter's 9th birthday, I have to let her know that her dog died in his sleep overnight. Happy birthday. FML

Today, I was telling my coworker that I was considering quitting the shady, 50-shades-of-scum business we work at. He snitched to our boss, who quickly fired me on bullshit charges of incompetence, theft, and workplace bullying. I guess I'm not getting a good reference from him. FML

#21461238
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19022) - you deserved it (5147)

On 08/27/2015 at 4:37am - work - by Anon (man) - United States

Today, after twelve straight hours of work, my fourteen year old son surprised me with a broken window and a cracked TV. He said, "I was swatting away a fly." FML

#21461075
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20182) - you deserved it (1364)

On 08/26/2015 at 8:28pm - kids - by tortureromoretorture - United States (New York)

Today, I planned on telling the girl I like that I have feelings for her. What I didn't plan on was having a panic attack and whispering "I really like you!" super creepily and immediately saying "bye" and running away in shame. FML

Today, my boss broke off our relationship because he said it's inappropriate. I really liked him, but I accepted it and respected his integrity. A few hours later, I found out he's now dating my colleague. FML

#21460841
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24639) - you deserved it (3665)

On 08/26/2015 at 4:33am - work - by salope (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, after coming home from the hospital after I fractured my foot, I fell in the bathroom and dislocated my wrist. The ER doctor couldn't stop laughing. FML

#21460636
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22100) - you deserved it (1787)

On 08/25/2015 at 6:46pm - health - by whovian221b (woman) - United States

Today, the boy that I met online six months ago and expressed my love to sent me a picture of himself and confessed how old he really was: thirteen. I'm eighteen years old and holding a steady job. FML

#21460634
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20843) - you deserved it (7100)

On 08/25/2015 at 6:38pm - love - by FlyAwayPlease (woman) - United Kingdom (Flintshire)

Today, I was undressing for my girlfriend. I thought I was being all smooth and sexy, until I went to sit on the side of the bed and beckon her over. Instead, I sat heavily on my balls, screamed, then fell off the bed sobbing like a girl. FML

#21460410
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21247) - you deserved it (5443)

On 08/25/2015 at 3:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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