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MrFD

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MrFD

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 3049
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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MrFD's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work at a small Microsoft partner company, I had to write an email explaining why Internet Explorer is superior to Google Chrome. FML

#21523050
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19223) - you deserved it (1881)

On 02/05/2016 at 11:36am - work - by Coccinelle - France

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

#21520327
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22979) - you deserved it (1503)

On 01/28/2016 at 3:39am - animals - by sweetie808 - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my son became convinced that his father cheated and we put the fertilized egg inside me to cover the whole thing up. He won't stop calling me "host mother". FML

#21519206
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21606) - you deserved it (1815)

On 01/25/2016 at 9:09am - kids - by anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was leaving the house to go on a date. My dad stopped me at the door and said confidently, "Tear that pussy up, son." I'm gay and my dad knows that. FML

#21519039
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21862) - you deserved it (3871)

On 01/24/2016 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, I crashed my car into a bridge, while playing a song with the line, "I crashed my car into a bridge". FML

#21518597
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20100) - you deserved it (5365)

On 01/23/2016 at 3:48pm - misc - by ugh (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized how much of a nutter my mother really is as she decided to write on a high visibility vest a "warning" that all foreigners, especially refugees, want to rape German women. She now wants to wear it each and every day in our hometown. FML

#21517384
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17483) - you deserved it (1500)

On 01/20/2016 at 2:00pm - misc - by ashamed - Germany

Today, my girlfriend actually slept with one of the celebrities on her "5 celebrities we're allowed to sleep with" list. FML

#21515102
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27305) - you deserved it (12948)

On 01/14/2016 at 7:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

Today, I faced my fears. I've always had a weird fear of looking out of windows at night, afraid a face would suddenly appear. When I heard a strange noise outside, I looked out the window. Sure enough, the face of a man suddenly appeared. FML

#21509223
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24588) - you deserved it (1885)

On 12/29/2015 at 11:16pm - misc - by NeverLookingAgain (woman) - United States

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

#21508476
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21972) - you deserved it (4761)

On 12/27/2015 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by whatthefuck (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend's dad came onto me. I was shocked and awkwardly tried to exit the situation. My boyfriend then sprang out and started shouting at me. Apparently, it was a "test" to see if I would still be attracted to him in 30 years. I failed. What. The. Fuck. FML

#21508382
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27808) - you deserved it (1648)

On 12/27/2015 at 12:31pm - love - by _schaden_freude - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I finally realized the toll working as a cashier 5 days a week during the holidays does to your psyche. I just said "Welcome To Walgreens", out of pure reflex, to my cat as she walked into my kitchen. FML

Today, my step mom sat me down and told me that she doesn't think that my dad is my biological father because she hasn't gotten pregnant from him. I don't think she quite understands the concept of being a step mom. FML

#21502978
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22970) - you deserved it (1966)

On 12/12/2015 at 3:58pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML

#21499606
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23420) - you deserved it (3460)

On 12/03/2015 at 7:52am - intimacy - by snortingspunk (woman) - South Africa

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

#21493785
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (8727)

On 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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Friday 5 February 2016

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