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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1028
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Mr40Hands : I go on FML when I shit. That's all you need to know

Mr40Hands's page activity

Visits<b>marryspencerreid</b> - the 10/05/2016 at 9:23pm<b>IMCRAZYYYY</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 1:30am<b>SoloAutotunE</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 8:05pm<b>CzaneWinters</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 4:09pm<b>liv1222</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 9:55pm<b>brick0</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 9:59am<b>IamAngryCoffee</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 1:12am<b>minxxx</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 2:41pm<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:56am<b>MissKylie</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 12:52pm<b>Emma1562</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 11:30pm<b>honksdozy</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 10:10pm<b>GavinoFreedom</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 4:06pm<b>ives999</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:02am<b>sp00derman</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 6:44pm<b>DaBayst</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 4:18pm<b>Ninjahiga</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 9:51pm<b>max367</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 4:30pm

Mr40Hands's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of Mr40Hands's badges

Mr40Hands's favorite FMLs

Today, while at my cosmetics job, an elderly lady came up to me asking for a product. I told her we had a smaller size and a larger size for a better deal. She told me she wanted the smaller size because she'd "probably be dead" before she finished that one. I laughed. She was serious. FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2012 at 4:47am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

by erockinthesuburb / 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom went through my textbook and sharpied everything that could be "pornographic." It's a high-school biology textbook. FML

by wow / 11/27/2011 at 8:07pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my wife has been bribing my daughter to keep quiet about her affair with my boss. That would explain the iPhone 4S, the $500 shoes, the $200 purse, and the professional $300 haircut. They told me it was because she had straight A's. FML

by brokeandalone / 11/20/2011 at 9:05pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, I was chased on my bike by a couple of guys in a car. I rode into a public park to cut through and try to lose them. I looked by to check if they were following me, but they had to stop. I laughed, looked forward, and rammed into a little girl. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2011 at 2:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I was playing a medieval game with my brother, when he took all of his character's clothes off and said, "Let's have sex!" I looked at him and said, "UH YOU ARE MY BROTHER!" He turns and looks at me, smiling and says, "But not in the game!" I am a 19 year old girl. He is 12. FML

by Sylvania / 06/10/2009 at 7:07pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy