Mini96

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Offline (the 01/26/2016 at 3:25am)

Mini96

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4746
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Mini96's page activity

Visits<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 4:29am<b>spankthatcow</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 2:04am<b>samdel12</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 3:25pm<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 3:05am<b>khoov19</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 1:32am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 8:36pm<b>DA3Z</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 7:32pm<b>foxmatrix15</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:30pm<b>skittycat213</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:38pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 9:05pm<b>schwaka</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 1:53am<b>waitwhatsgoingon</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:32am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 7:56pm<b>tifdunc</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 11:32am<b>jerzjay</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 10:21am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 10:32am<b>notmepleade</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 10:27pm<b>GeneralStew</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 7:32pm

Fucked!<b>khoov19</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:32am

Mini96's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Mini96's badges

Mini96's favorite FMLs

Today, I was leaving the house to go on a date. My dad stopped me at the door and said confidently, "Tear that pussy up, son." I'm gay and my dad knows that. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2016 at 8:24pm / Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional) / Intimacy

Today, I twisted my knee while cutting firewood with my grandpa. The pain was so crippling, I fell over screaming. His response? "Quit your bitching, I had my kneecaps blown off in Vietnam. They had to stitch 'em back on." He's never been to Vietnam, or even out of the country. FML

by fuckoffgramps / 01/24/2016 at 12:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, I found out my family refers to my room as "the virgin cave". FML

by Dexter_39476 / 01/24/2016 at 12:40am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous

Today, I crashed my car into a bridge, while playing a song with the line, "I crashed my car into a bridge". FML

by ugh / 01/23/2016 at 3:48pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my pubic hairs were poking into my wang, I went to scratch it. Something bit my hand. FML

by swag papi / 01/22/2016 at 12:47am / Australia (Western Australia) / Animals

Today, I entered the bathroom to discover that my brother had left semen and filthy water all over the floor and counter. I confronted him and demanded that he clean it up. My parents heard, sighed, and sent me back into the bathroom to clean it up myself. The towel was soaked too. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2016 at 7:43am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/19/2016 at 6:03am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, my dad and uncle got in an argument over money and ended up fighting in the back garden. Only, my dad is a muay thai fighter and my uncle is an MMA fighter, and they're refusing to stop until one of them is out cold. I foresee me driving them both to the hospital before midnight. FML

by enya / 01/18/2016 at 5:29pm / Luxembourg / Miscellaneous

Today, I was knocked unconscious by the 10 year-old I was babysitting because it was his younger sister's bedtime and he didn't want her to go. When I came to, their mother was screaming at me for sleeping on the job. In the middle of the kitchen floor. I lost a job and gained a killer headache. FML

by kids shouldnt have hard sports equipment / 01/17/2016 at 8:48pm / Australia (South Australia) / Kids

Today, I found out that the only reason I'm alive is because my dad beat the living shit out of my mom to stop her getting an abortion. FML

by Anonymous / 01/17/2016 at 2:26am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML

by sciencenat / 01/14/2016 at 1:36am / Work

Today, after months of trying to train my cockatiel to perch on my finger, he finally trusted me enough to fly from his cage and land on my hand. I panicked and accidentally backhanded him across the room. FML

by parasheeeet / 01/13/2016 at 12:05pm / United States (Alabama) / Animals

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

by Bex98 / 01/11/2016 at 3:17am / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2016 at 9:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I played charades with my girlfriend and her family. When it was her turn to act out a phrase, she simply walked to the center of the room and pointed to herself and then at me. It took less than 5 seconds for someone to correctly guess "Beauty and the Beast". FML

by fuglymug / 01/08/2016 at 4:48pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love