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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 925
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Maybelline008 : Hey you! Yeah, you! Hi!

Okay, enough perkiness for one summary.

I am addicted to FML. I read it every morning along with the morning newspaper. Yes, I enjoy reading the newspaper.... I rarely comment. Sometimes, I want to comment but I stop myself because I do not tolerate the idiocy that visits the website on a regular basis.

Maybelline008's page activity

Visits<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 4:17pm<b>ptvbabe229</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 10:28pm<b>jman1324</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 3:48pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 4:49pm<b>Spencyy</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 6:30pm<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 7:03am<b>Trollx</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 9:28am<b>sullysair123</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 3:36am<b>ReverseCarb</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 9:52am<b>enter______name</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 1:23am<b>Leafa</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 5:03am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:24pm<b>pris0027</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Elidorranos</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:32am<b>Nooblah</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 9:24pm<b>AE101</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 9:26pm<b>oddities</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 5:22pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 7:14pm

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 10:48pm<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 1:03pm

Maybelline008's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Maybelline008's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my mom gives my brother tips on how to hurt my feelings the most. FML

by LovedByFamily / 10/08/2012 at 11:08am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Miscellaneous

Today, my estranged mother texted me saying, "Gran died, LOL." My grandmother and I were fairly close, so I was shocked and disgusted. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and asked if she knew what "LOL" meant. She did. FML

by burn in hell / 09/25/2012 at 5:28pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

by ewww / 08/26/2012 at 5:21am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

by TheBeautifulOne / 08/23/2012 at 9:42am / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my co-worker told me I should stop smoking cigarettes because it makes my breath "smell like shit" and makes my teeth look as yellow as corn. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. FML

by pridekills / 08/19/2012 at 12:19am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML

by rongo12 / 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML

by reddd / 05/10/2012 at 2:44am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

by creepedoutlady / 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was listening to my son's teacher gossip about students whilst in the grocery store. I was thrilled when she described my son as "A model student". However, she then went on to say, "Which is surprising considering that his parents are trailer trash." FML

by kindgartin / 04/23/2011 at 5:26am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Kids