About Mauskau : I don't need anything exciting on here, you already came here for the poro.
Mauskau's FML badges
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Mauskau's favorite FMLs
Today, I woke up to go to school. I was unbelievably tired, but I gathered the courage to go take my shower. I then took a long shower, cleaned up my room, got dressed, and ate breakfast. Going back to my room, I looked at the clock, which read 3:22 AM. FML
by vinniesuckmadack / 04/24/2009 at 1:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Fitz / 04/12/2009 at 9:53am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML
by no_leather_of_any_kind / 04/07/2009 at 3:08am / United States (Oregon) / Love
Today, my grandma gave me the 'abstinence' speech. I had thought she already left to go back to FL but then came into my room to tell me how proud she was of me to keep my virginity. I was doing it doggie-style with my boyfriend. FML
by GrandmasWhore / 04/04/2009 at 1:59am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 12:36am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML
by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by Nick / 03/20/2009 at 12:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I was working at Target when an old woman asked me if I could help her find her favorite bra. I asked what brand it was when she replied "I'll check the tag". She lifted up the front of her shirt, and flipped one cup of her bra inside out. I saw everything. FML
by laurenmay / 03/06/2009 at 6:11pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I was in the change room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML
by nuberific / 03/05/2009 at 1:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by eaa145 / 03/03/2009 at 4:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
by Noname / 01/17/2009 at 7:52pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Gob / 01/16/2009 at 9:36am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
- Today, under the Northern Lights of the Arctic Circle, I presented my girlfriend with an engagement… Today, I found myself completely naked, tied to a chair with a slice of ham on each breast. Note to… Today, I walked into a mirror in a shop. No one would have known had my face not stayed printed on…