Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 April 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14999
  • Number of comments : 1939
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 39 posted

About Mauskau : My name is Zabrina, I'm 4"11 and I'm a Fieldwork Technology Programmer. I would like to become a pilot but I'm too short for cadetships, so I will have to get there the hard way and spend lots of money but I might just stick to IT.

I live in Maidenhead, which is near London in England. I would like to have some hobbies other than gaming and weight training, but I don't have enough time between work and sleeping. I don't even have time for gaming anymore. ;-;

If you would like to have a conversation with me, please start it with something more interesting than "hello", "hi" or "hi babe". I'm not here for online dating, so please don't try. Thank you :>

Mauskau's page activity

Visits<b>EvilTurtle</b> - 16 hours ago<b>COURT_KING</b> - 21 hours ago<b>persianchick</b> - yesterday at 5:12pm<b>jsan727</b> - yesterday at 2:49am<b>Furby94</b> - yesterday at 12:58am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - yesterday at 10:26pm<b>Celeden</b> - yesterday at 9:07pm<b>chr1sF</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 6:51pm<b>RA91</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 6:23pm<b>Artigedude65</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:17pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 10:44am<b>Scorpio01</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 9:47am<b>goodvsevil1275</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 11:36pm<b>holymacabre</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 8:32pm<b>skcmcpk</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 11:23am<b>taterrtots</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 5:13am<b>TwistedWires</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 1:32am<b>tigersman1c</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 11:17pm

Fucked!<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 12:04pm<b>JDSini</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 10:54pm<b>JayL80</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 8:00am<b>batman169</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:42am<b>MasterTron</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 1:03am<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 9:10pm<b>jlmartin411</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 7:29pm<b>Saathvik</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 8:59pm<b>rockey44</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 5:41pm<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 2:59am<b>csjc</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 7:26pm<b>gamermonster</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 9:39pm<b>IndieCowboy</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 2:44am<b>Siehnados</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 10:40pm<b>bigdfootball97</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 4:51am<b>Hans182</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 2:17am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 6:15am<b>nicolai44</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 10:58pm

Mauskau's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of Mauskau's badges

Mauskau's favorite FMLs

Today, during a basketball game, I fell into metal chairs which then decided to fold in, causing me to fall to the floor in a very dramatic and painful fall. When I stood up, so did everyone else and they were all clapping, including the other team. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23049) - you deserved it (3294)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:25am - health - by aurorason - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered that if you slip on ice, imitating Mario from Super Mario Bros when he attempts to stop himself slipping, won't work in real life. I now have a broken nose, as well as a blood trail running from my driveway into my kitchen. FML


I agree, your life sucks (8594) - you deserved it (30152)

On 01/25/2010 at 1:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I noticed that in my cover letter I wrote "I also have an eye.", instead of "I also have an eye for details.", and I have been sending it out for the past few weeks. No wonder I haven't gotten any replies. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9595) - you deserved it (29720)

On 11/14/2009 at 11:52am - work - by crazylobster (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I learned the hard way that if you walk up to a hobo by your car pooping, they will chase you yelling, "Get out of my bathroom!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (33694) - you deserved it (4005)

On 11/05/2009 at 12:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I met up with a girl I've been talking to on the internet for a year and a half. Turns out she edits her moustache out of all her photos. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16990) - you deserved it (33712)

On 10/28/2009 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was walking when I heard a car horn honk. I looked up to see a hot guy giving me a thumbs up. As he got a better look at me, he made a disgusted face and flipped his hand so he was giving me a thumbs down. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36536) - you deserved it (4039)

On 10/26/2009 at 4:02pm - misc - by notsohot (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got back from vacation and realised I still had the motel key. The key-ring has the address on it, so you can post it back to them. I drove to the postbox and posted the key. I then discovered that the motel key won't start my car. FML


I agree, your life sucks (17061) - you deserved it (40036)

On 09/23/2009 at 9:15am - misc - by fmlxxxx (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, while riding in the car with my friends, we stopped at a red light. To our left, a very obese, middle aged man slowly unbuttoned his shirt and spread it out. He then stared at us while massaging his nipples with his thumb and index fingers for the duration of the red light. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48722) - you deserved it (5451)

On 09/04/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by Scarred (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49965) - you deserved it (6641)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:41am - kids - by mariokarter (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48175) - you deserved it (12772)

On 08/13/2009 at 2:17pm - misc - by fearofzombies (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (292902) - you deserved it (19737)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was driving to the grocery store with my 7 year-old son. When I was approaching a stop sign, I look next to me and see a guy with a triangle shaped head. I tell my son "Look at the guy with the triangle head." My window was open. So was his. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9034) - you deserved it (69862)

On 05/03/2009 at 9:44am - misc - by mylifesucks123 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I noticed that someone smeared "wash me" into the grime of my car. I decided to take it to get a wash. I pulled up, put my vehicle in neutral, and kicked back as it slowly started to move. You never realize how long it takes a sun roof to close until water is dumping on your head. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14902) - you deserved it (58813)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up to go to school. I was unbelievably tired, but I gathered the courage to go take my shower. I then took a long shower, cleaned up my room, got dressed, and ate breakfast. Going back to my room, I looked at the clock, which read 3:22 AM. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45351) - you deserved it (36860)

On 04/24/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by vinniesuckmadack (man) - United States (Illinois)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #20
  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: