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Mattybeans's favorite FMLs
by well i'm fucked / 02/03/2014 at 5:47pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by notakeeper / 01/02/2014 at 10:50pm / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML
by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love
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- Today, I told my coworker who I have been crushing on for a while, that I really enjoyed our time… Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I…