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Martinez0285

Offline (the 07/25/2015 at 11:25pm) | Search for a member

Martinez0285

32Fucked!

Martinez0285Martinez0285
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 27 February 1985 (30 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4843
  • Number of comments : 141
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Martinez0285 : I'm Batman..... Shhhhhhhh

https://www.youtube.com/user/x1xBatmanuelx1x

Martinez0285's page activity

Visits<b>murr52727</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 12:58am<b>CarmenCnh</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 6:59pm<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 6:47pm<b>Emi1y</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 10:14pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 8:18am<b>RandomUsername88</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 12:52pm<b>_ansley_2013</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 9:38pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 12:44pm<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:10pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 11:31am<b>Mons</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 8:26pm<b>kevinivek</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 2:16pm<b>carl_carl_</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 2:12pm<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 11:05am<b>MrsJellyBean</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 12:43am<b>Kataclysm97</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 2:20pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:24pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 3:37pm

Fucked!<b>CarmenCnh</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 12:59am<b>_ansley_2013</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:38am<b>MrsJellyBean</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 6:44am<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 9:21pm<b>Kataclysm97</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 8:20pm<b>babeybazooka</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 7:59pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 11:25pm<b>niightmares</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 4:08am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 1:03am<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 10:16pm<b>longlivelife</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 10:41pm<b>SteamyPenguin</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 4:55pm<b>delilablue95</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 10:05am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 2:21am<b>SarahSehhati</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 10:11pm<b>kyliefoote</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 10:29am<b>amandalynn84</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 4:50am<b>suszyy</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 4:52am

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Martinez0285's favorite FMLs

Today, one of my bosses said, "You're going to take this as an insult, but it's not. At a certain age, women are supposed to cut their hair short." I have long hair. My bosses have all of the social skills of the guys from Big Bang Theory. FML

#20798680
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37740) - you deserved it (3352)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:23am - work - by Irreverend (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, one of my bosses said, "You're going to take this as an insult, but it's not. At a certain age, women are supposed to cut their hair short." I have long hair. My bosses have all of the social skills of the guys from Big Bang Theory. FML

#20798680
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37740) - you deserved it (3352)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:23am - work - by Irreverend (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while wiping my ass, the broken finger that has been set straight dipped into the toilet and touched a turd. This keeps happening since I broke it, and I'm sure it will again. FML

#20790784
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41044) - you deserved it (11274)

On 07/18/2013 at 4:53pm - health - by broken finger (man) - United States

Today, I suddenly started having excruciating pain. My husband took me to the ER, where I waited for three hours in agony to be seen. By the time a doctor got to me, the pain had mostly gone, but it was found to be a kidney stone. I was told, "Next time, don't wait so long." Really? FML

Today, I had an allergy test. Not only was I allergic to 35 out of the 40 items, they also found out that I'm allergic to the latex gloves my doctor happened to be wearing. Now my entire back is covered in a rash that will last at least another week. FML

#20783362
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49402) - you deserved it (3008)

On 07/15/2013 at 12:23am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend and I were furniture shopping. They had miniature versions built of some of the desks. He commented how they were "cute for little kids" to use. They were 6 inches tall. I had to explain to him that they were only models, not real desks. I'm dating Zoolander. FML

#20782878
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37213) - you deserved it (4732)

On 07/14/2013 at 9:07pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

#20775827
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105740) - you deserved it (12479)

On 07/11/2013 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I made two cakes. One for my boyfriend's birthday tomorrow, the other for my family so they wouldn't eat the birthday cake. I came home to find they ate half of each. FML

Today, I poured my heart out to my now ex-girlfriend over the recent passing away of my grandmother. Her eyes glazed over multiple times, and when I said that I don't know how to cope with everything, her advice was simply, "Shotgun. Mouth. Blam." FML

#20766944
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52361) - you deserved it (4918)

On 07/06/2013 at 12:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Lithuania (Vilniaus Apskritis)

Today, I lost my car keys, so I asked my ex-husband if he still had his spare to my car. He said he'd send it. I got an empty envelope with a troll face on it. There's a reason I left him. FML

#20738006
122 comments

Today, at my job at my tattoo parlor, yet another client offered to pay for his tattoo by "letting" me sleep with him. This client happens to be my boyfriend's best friend, whose girlfriend is having me tattoo his name on her wrist next week. FML

#20735377
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49732) - you deserved it (3679)

On 06/19/2013 at 2:46pm - work - by notkatvond (woman) - United States

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73419) - you deserved it (7254)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I accidentally left some music playing on my iPad, then left to do some errands. When I came back, I found it smashed into a million pieces. Apparently, grandpa couldn't find any other way to "shut off that goddamn music." FML

#20722030
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50401) - you deserved it (11397)

On 06/12/2013 at 5:45pm - misc - by MsGlaDos - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend lost his temper with me and complained that my "constant" apologies for upsetting him drive him insane, and without thinking, I said I was sorry. He hung up and I haven't heard from him since. FML

#20705829
173 comments

Today, I received a death threat from some nutball accusing me of being part of some big government conspiracy called "Haarp." According to this psycho, I'm responsible for causing the recent tornadoes in Oklahoma. I'm just a small-time weatherman. FML

#20703997
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46928) - you deserved it (3386)

On 06/03/2013 at 7:13pm - misc - by fuck wannabe knowitalls (man) - United States



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