About Marie_Koushel : Dance is my passion and competition is my life
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Marie_Koushel's favorite FMLs
Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML
by IamAflyingCat / 10/22/2013 at 5:12am / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 10/22/2013 at 12:44am / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Health
Today, I was assigned to fill in for a French teacher who was out sick. I had asked the class to name some French-speaking countries. I called on one girl and she replied, "Uh, Europe. That's, like, the only other one, right?" Nobody disagreed. I'm filling in for the rest of the month. FML
by :| / 10/21/2013 at 9:40pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
by OutOfMyMind / 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by the_lameo_geek / 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML
by Anonymous / 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm / United States (New York) / Love
by Teiu88 / 10/20/2013 at 10:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by ShittyProposal / 10/20/2013 at 3:06am / United States (Ohio) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/20/2013 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Work
by nofriends / 10/19/2013 at 5:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML
by overly nationalistic redneck / 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband and I were talking about celebrities he finds attractive. All of these beautiful, talented, glamorous women were starting to make me feel very plain, so he attempted to console me by saying, "But I love you. You're attainable!" FML
by AchievementUnlocked? / 10/19/2013 at 3:30am / United States / Love
by Huedadaa / 10/18/2013 at 8:05pm / France (Picardie) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 7:44pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
by O-|---<=~ / 10/18/2013 at 7:01pm / United States (Washington) / Love
- Today, my grandma gave me a sex talk. Not the usual one, either. This one was about blowjobs. I had… Today, I had to say to my 23-year-old son that it's not a compliment to tell a woman that he wants… Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him…
- Today, I went to walk in my front door. In the span of 2 seconds, my phone in my hand slammed into… Today, in precalc class the kid behind me farted and everyone turned around. We all laughed at the… Today, as i was wrestling my girlfriend, i had told her I'd go really easy on her because i did not…