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Maltastic

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Maltastic
  • Town/Country : San Antonio, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 7 June 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 23460
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Maltastic : A college course taking Jr. at a small school who spends most of her free time reading or working on the newspaper, lacking a social life of any kind, who'll do anything she can to make it into the world of Design and Magazines. (To be updated)

Maltastic's last visitors

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Maltastic's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Maltastic's favorite FMLs

Today, one of my co-workers invited me to a cookout at her house with some other people from my new job. She said to wear my suit. Assuming she had a pool, I showed up in a bikini, only to find everyone else wearing business attire and staring at me like I had lost my mind. FML

#520229
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21001) - you deserved it (60797)

On 03/21/2009 at 10:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

#505587
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67779) - you deserved it (10949)

On 03/21/2009 at 3:18am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

#278783
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49039) - you deserved it (93064)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by SpiderMan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was pushing my 4 year old on the swing. I did what we call our "under doggie push": I throw her up in the air while I run underneath her before she hits me coming back down. I walked away to get my water and she yelled across the park "Can we do it doggie-style again?" FML

#234103
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52470) - you deserved it (16908)

On 03/07/2009 at 1:28pm - kids - by Dang-ItsDanielle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put my picture into a celebrity look alike website. The three matches that came up were Barbra Streisand, Hillary Clinton, and Boy George. I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML

#224033
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43445) - you deserved it (5585)

On 03/06/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by oconron (man) - United States (Virginia)



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