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Maddiekaye123

Offline (the 11/25/2014 at 3:04pm) | Search for a member

Maddiekaye123

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 538
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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Maddiekaye123's page activity

Visits<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 12:55am<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 10:28pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 7:22am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 4:51pm<b>papayeya</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 3:33pm<b>xMnky</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 4:21pm

Maddiekaye123's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Maddiekaye123's badges

Maddiekaye123's favorite FMLs

Today, my 3-year-old son discovered his testicles. When I asked him what they were, he replied, "They're my balls! They make my winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it. FML

#21084464
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40442) - you deserved it (5829)

On 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

#21054451
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52513) - you deserved it (10354)

On 02/08/2014 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53875) - you deserved it (32628)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

#21001182
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50342) - you deserved it (5006)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

#20994621
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55545) - you deserved it (3182)

On 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by confsused - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up, got dressed, and left for the 1 hour drive to the nearest vet. When I arrived, I realized that I left my cat in its carrier on my kitchen counter. FML

#20908268
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40512) - you deserved it (24656)

On 10/05/2013 at 12:00pm - animals - by wasted_gas - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to explain to my mother that faith healing will not work on plumbing. FML

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23735) - you deserved it (94958)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56927) - you deserved it (8960)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

#20779957
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29087) - you deserved it (56922)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

#20584918
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50850) - you deserved it (10901)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39427) - you deserved it (2620)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML

#20553373
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48829) - you deserved it (6289)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, after therapy for obsessing over every woman who talks to me, all I could think about was how I could seduce my therapist. I think I still need a lot of help. FML

#20133155
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21499) - you deserved it (5324)

On 10/25/2012 at 7:09pm - love - by mental - United States



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