About MGITSWFTC : I'm a guitarist, aspiring recording engineer, audiophile, classical enthusiast, general music fanatic, concert junkie, chess player, lax bro, and movie lover. My favorite bands are Led Zeppelin, Modest Mouse, Caravan of Thieves, Rodrigo y Gabriela, and Gogol Bordello. That's really about it for me. Have a superb day!
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MGITSWFTC's favorite FMLs
Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML
by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 8:01am / Australia (Queensland) / Work
by JamiesMom / 05/13/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Michigan) / Animals
by Anonymous / 05/07/2013 at 4:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
Today, I tried lying to my parents for the first time. My mother is a neuroscientist and my father is a psychologist. Somehow, they managed to make me admit that I was lying before I'd even finished. FML
by blondie107 / 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
by SkeetinKeaton / 05/06/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Kids
by me / 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by FML136969 / 05/05/2013 at 7:30pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at my aunt and uncle's house. I went to the bathroom and after I washed my hands, I took a Q-tip out of the carton to clean my ears. When I reached for a second one, I noticed that every Q-tip in the carton was actually already used. FML
by grossed out / 05/05/2013 at 7:10pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML
by poopydaddy / 05/03/2013 at 7:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 3:59pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Holidays
Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML
by Igor / 12/19/2012 at 12:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, while at the beach, as a joke, I told my girlfriend that I was a shark. She then poked my eyes and punched me in the nose. When I started to get mad, she just shrugged and asked, "What? You're the one that wanted to be a shark. Don't you watch Shark Week?" FML
by sharkboy / 06/10/2012 at 10:33pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML
by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…