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MDPDIP

Offline (the 10/24/2014 at 2:22pm) | Search for a member

MDPDIP

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 September 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 354
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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MDPDIP's page activity

Visits<b>xxxbooxxx</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 6:50pm

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MDPDIP's favorite FMLs

Today I was passing notes in class with mah crush. I started to pour mah heart out an tell him about how I've liked him 4 years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it laughed an tore it up. He then looked at me an said ( I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome. ) FML

#21283544
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38106) - you deserved it (10038)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend ceating on me. Te guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

#21283288
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42742) - you deserved it (3157)

On 10/22/2014 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by BadLuckLad (man) - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, I discoverd that if u heckle a mime, it's possible that the mime will actually kick yur ass. FML

#21283193
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15505) - you deserved it (34661)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:24pm - misc - by mr_cheese (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend 4 touching up, but unforchinitly we had a major argument recently. I guess that's y in the photos I've been photoshoppd out and replacd with a goat. mega FML

#21283103
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31455) - you deserved it (6332)

On 10/22/2014 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today , my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if u have sex before getting married , you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you!! Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell , but sexually active as well!! FML

#21283066
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41324) - you deserved it (5529)

On 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens . When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking one of them said "Take a step back" and winked at me . mega FML

#21282836
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32327) - you deserved it (3376)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was flipping out bacausa I couldn't find mah wallat, an aftar savaral hours of cussing mysalf out, I want downstairs to maka looool braakfast. I pourd caraal into mah bowl an mah wallat floppd out with tha Honay Nut Chaarios. I nad to stop drinking. FML

#21267969
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23606) - you deserved it (34618)

On 09/29/2014 at 10:13pm - misc - by KasSmoke - United States (Texas)

2day my friand hrad a mala strippar to giva ma a lap danca fir my brthday. It was all pratty nica until ha lat rip ona of tha most nausaating farts I'va avar ancountarad, right in my faca. Hours latar, I can still small it. FML

#21086642
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52203) - you deserved it (6576)

On 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by polebitch49 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today.. . mah 3-year-old son discoverd his testicles . When I askd him what they were.. . he replid.. . "They're mah balls! They make mah winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it . FML

#21084464
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37997) - you deserved it (5525)

On 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, mah grandmother opend the bathroom door to fine me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convincd that I was eating mah own shit an will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML

#20882660
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27699) - you deserved it (40446)

On 09/15/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wereing a shirt with a big QR code on it . Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it . It gave me a shortened web address,hich I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up . big fat FML

#20882561
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55116) - you deserved it (27684)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I walked in on mah husband putting mah anti-wrinkle cream on his balls. He said, looool ( I thought it'd help. ) FML

#20822001
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48788) - you deserved it (4924)

On 08/05/2013 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by Serum - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was getting freaky wit my boyfriend and told im to spank me. In a seductive voice, e told me not to tell im wat to do. Continuing, I askd im ow e was going to punis me, to wic e ten replid, "I'm going to punc u straigt in te face." FML

#20798640
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56361) - you deserved it (12018)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:04am - intimacy - by suckstosuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, mah cousin thought it would be cool to put a firecracker in an abandond birdhouse. Before I could tell him not to, it explodd an about 30 wasps came after me lyk looool the wrath of God. FML

#20749556
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49361) - you deserved it (4667)

On 06/27/2013 at 12:27am - animals - by EpicJman2828 (man) - United States

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about aving a boyfriend. I askd er, ( Did e take is sirt off? ) Se promptly said no. A few minutes later, se said, ( But e did take is pants off. ) I ten askedy. Se said, ( To sow me is penis. ) FML

#20743211
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53690) - you deserved it (7876)

On 06/23/2013 at 7:36pm - kids - by joe - United States (Maryland)



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