This member hasn't filled in their description.
LovesxMonster's FML badges
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
LovesxMonster's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 02/25/2014 at 4:17pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy; I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off all eyes turned to me. FML
by nomwar / 06/17/2013 at 9:55am / United States / Health
by newyorkers / 06/17/2013 at 8:46am / United States (New York) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 06/17/2013 at 1:54am / United States / Miscellaneous
by scarredforlife / 06/16/2013 at 7:27pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by not a brain cell in sight / 06/16/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by idontwanttoknow / 06/16/2013 at 7:37am / United States / Intimacy
Today, my future sister-in-law cancelled my invitation to her and my brother's wedding. Her reason was that I was incredibly rude to announce my pregnancy to my family at a time like this, because it took all the attention away from her. FML
by Anonymous / 06/15/2013 at 5:58pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by fuckedbyahipster / 06/15/2013 at 12:13pm / Finland / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/15/2013 at 3:32am / United States (Louisiana) / Love
Today, my son visited for the first time in three years, asking to stay a while. It turns out he insulted someone online and gave his address in case they wanted to fight him. They accepted the offer, and so my son's imaginary Muay Thai skills went AWOL, along with his testicles. FML
by I fathered a pussy. / 06/14/2013 at 6:12pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, while working the register, a known mentally-unstable man approached me. He ended up telling me that the Statue of Liberty is sexist and a screw-up by Washington. When I told him that the French made it, he told me to shut up and complained to my manager. He knows me by name now. FML
by fubuggie / 06/14/2013 at 1:57am / United States (Vermont) / Work
Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML
by Hannah / 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML
by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, I tried to lift my girlfriend and spin her around like in a Rom-Com. I started the spin, then heard a pop. The pain caused me to yelp and fall to the floor, dropping her on top of me. I dislocated my kneecap trying to be romantic. She only weighs about 90 lbs. FML
by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 11:13am / United States (Minnesota) / Health