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Lizza330

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Lizza330
  • Town/Country : Narnia, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3740
  • Number of comments : 165
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Lizza330 : Hi

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Lizza330's favorite FMLs

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
507 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17103) - you deserved it (123223)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50693) - you deserved it (5704)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31973) - you deserved it (4329)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35104) - you deserved it (2804)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I watched The Passion of the Christ with my girlfriend. She kept scoffing at what she called the "historical inaccuracies", and actually tried to convince me that Hitler killed Jesus. When I corrected her, she looked at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane. FML

#20498635
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28977) - you deserved it (4351)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm - love - by and she doesn't even give bjs (man) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)

Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML

#20498426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20416) - you deserved it (8128)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:59pm - misc - by theydidsmellitthough (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I told my sister that boys are stronger than girls. She responded by beating the living crap out of me to prove me wrong. She's twelve. I'm eighteen. FML

#20496678
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10723) - you deserved it (53583)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by manhandled by a little girl (man) - United States (California)

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

#20488428
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36405) - you deserved it (2020)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

#20488428
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36405) - you deserved it (2020)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

#20462136
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31828) - you deserved it (3396)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by WTF (man) -

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27677) - you deserved it (3048)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML

#20427495
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39906) - you deserved it (8774)

On 12/28/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by kmtranter - United Kingdom (Brent)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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