LizetteBerenice

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Offline (the 07/21/2015 at 3:59pm)

LizetteBerenice

99Fucked!

LizetteBereniceLizetteBerenice
  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 29 July 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9125
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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LizetteBerenice's page activity

Visits<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - 7 hours ago<b>rissamarie</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 10:09am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 11:04am<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 2:40pm<b>throlin</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 2:50pm<b>deeznutz62</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 1:52pm<b>MuslimShady</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 12:44am<b>LostInSpace00</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 3:55pm<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 9:42am<b>Jbam1997</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 12:14pm<b>Spiral061</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 3:10pm<b>Wane8822</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 2:25pm<b>droid1126</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 10:43pm<b>TacoTerrorist</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 3:13pm<b>10220706</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 12:10am<b>flannelboss27</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 3:02pm<b>H3LL_K1D</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 9:26pm<b>jman1324</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 2:09pm

Fucked!<b>delfino1604</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 5:13pm<b>droid1126</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 4:43am<b>9Ja4cOb</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 6:55am<b>kangx1</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 5:48pm<b>niksatter96</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 6:28am<b>johndog699</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:59am<b>dk1991</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 8:50am<b>jacky75</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 9:20pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 7:42pm<b>Eyalsh</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:07pm<b>rafa015</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 4:48pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 2:31pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 2:08pm<b>dudeguy1989</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 3:14am<b>whoopydoodah</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 6:21am<b>AkumaUchiha</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:19pm<b>kooljac702</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 10:38am<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 1:25am

LizetteBerenice's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of LizetteBerenice's badges

LizetteBerenice's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML

by oh no / 06/22/2015 at 4:58pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML

by Iamsosorry / 06/22/2015 at 7:35am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Work

Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2015 at 9:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, as I finished my piano recital and took a bow, I farted into the microphone. FML

by fartypants / 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I took my 6-year-old son to visit his grandmother, as the doctors say she only has days left to live. Minutes after we arrived, he leaned in close and told her that she's going to hell. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2015 at 11:58am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked outside to get the paper, and saw a dying bird I assumed had flown into the window. It was warm so I thought it might still be alive. I wasn't wearing my glasses though, and was trying to nurse a dog turd back to life. FML

by nerderer / 06/04/2015 at 10:17pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, the phone kept ringing so I picked it up and answered. When there was no response, it took a minute to realize that I was still in bed and talking to my hand. FML

by Sleepy / 05/31/2015 at 11:51am / United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a text from a guy I hooked up with. I'm not really interested in him, so I rushed out of his house last night. He was letting me know I left my wallet at his house, and if I want it, I'll have to let him take me to dinner. FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2015 at 1:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I pulled a piece of dental floss out of my ass. How it got there is one of life's great mysteries. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2015 at 3:42am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

Today, I read my 10-year-old sister's diary. That's how I found out about her disturbingly detailed plan to murder me, make it look like suicide, date my boyfriend after helping him get over my death, then marry him. FML

by Anonymus / 04/18/2015 at 3:01am / Sweden / Kids

Today, I heard my 2-year-old sister crying, so I left my room to comfort her. She looked at me, held my hand, escorted me back to my room and closed the door. FML

by transcendingnerd / 04/13/2015 at 6:46am / Philippines (Manila) / Kids

Today, after telling my parents that I want to be a vegetarian, I got grounded. Apparently, "black people can't be vegetarians" and, I'm "crazy for even suggesting something like that." FML

by shawnsmuffins / 03/19/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

by parkoursam / 03/10/2015 at 12:45pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous