Lizardgirl

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Offline (the 03/09/2015 at 9:17pm)

Lizardgirl

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 633
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Lizardgirl's page activity

Visits<b>andreea99</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 7:46pm<b>jill97</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 2:21pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 2:24am<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 9:26pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 6:13pm<b>daisy234082</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 9:14pm<b>turdoblast</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 2:23am<b>UndyingKarma</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 4:13pm<b>yavultheturtle</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 6:14am<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 4:02am<b>sashakotlik</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 12:38pm<b>gshocker20</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 10:51pm<b>thebuckeyenut52</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 10:05pm<b>sam882</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 4:44pm<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 3:42am<b>Neverafter</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 12:33am<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 5:44pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 12:13am

Lizardgirl's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of Lizardgirl's badges

Lizardgirl's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a haircut. The guy quickly cut off most of the hair above my forehead. When I angrily asked him what he was doing, he said, "Quitting." FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2015 at 10:22pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, my friend took our prank war too far when he secretly added peanuts to my food. I have a peanut allergy. FML

by peanutprobs / 10/31/2014 at 5:12pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Health

Today, my bully made me cry once again. It's been going on for weeks. I don't know who to turn to; I can't say anything because I'd get into even more trouble. He even stole my Nintendo 3DS and won't give it back. My bully is my girlfriend's son. He's 10. FML

by PickedOnByDamien / 10/02/2013 at 4:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

by pixkalexi / 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I was dragged to a Super Bowl party. While there, the host's kid threw 3 cups of apple sauce at my feet, which then exploded and covered my jeans. 10 minutes later, the host's wife announced that she was pregnant with twins. All I could come up with was, "You're making more!?" FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2013 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, after 2 weeks of not having sex, my pregnant girlfriend and I finally fooled around. This was immediately followed by her bursting into tears and begging me to make her a ham steak. FML

by Anonymous / 02/02/2013 at 9:41am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

by DeadScared / 09/18/2011 at 8:23pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2009 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

by fmlfmlfml / 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals