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LizHasAJellyfish

Offline (the 01/22/2016 at 4:56pm) | Search for a member

LizHasAJellyfish

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 July 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 234
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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LizHasAJellyfish's page activity

Visits<b>sCrEaMiNgToAsT</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 6:04am<b>JokerJim2013</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 11:49am

LizHasAJellyfish's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of LizHasAJellyfish's badges

LizHasAJellyfish's favorite FMLs

Today, I was chilling in my comfy zip-up sweatshirt when I realized I was running late for an acting class. In my mad panic, I forgot I didn't have a shirt or bra underneath. Later in class, I was performing a scene and started to unzip my sweatshirt. You can figure out the rest. FML

#21512660
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19476) - you deserved it (5022)

On 01/07/2016 at 9:08pm - misc - by AccidentalFlasher (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after several months desperately searching for a job and feeling pretty insecure and unimportant, I drove 15 miles to a job interview. On parking my car at the destination, I found that during my drive a spider had been making a cobweb between the car and my hair. FML

#21489841
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20541) - you deserved it (1665)

On 11/08/2015 at 5:03am - animals - by Geemeisters - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, while shopping, I stepped a bit closer to a couple that stood in front of a display. The girl then shot me a nasty look, grabbed her boyfriend and started pointedly making out with him. I was just trying to buy some butter. But thanks for reminding me how lonely I am. FML

#21486444
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23939) - you deserved it (1716)

On 10/31/2015 at 9:23am - love - by It wasnt even that close (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my roommate broke into my spice cabinet so he could get high off of my nutmeg. FML

#21485980
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21443) - you deserved it (1715)

On 10/29/2015 at 9:34pm - misc - by GonnaLockUpMySpices (man) - United States (California)

Today, as I snuck downstairs for a midnight movie, I witnessed my dad "polishing his wand" to Harry Potter porn in the living room. FML

#21482519
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28214) - you deserved it (3448)

On 10/21/2015 at 8:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, my brother slapped me across the face with a piece of raw chicken for not liking his Instagram post. FML

Today, while looking through my son's browser history, I found a Google search for "stop looking in my history u nosey cunt". I swore last week that I don't invade his privacy, so I can't even punish him for the bad language without looking like a lying bastard. FML

#21478533
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12082) - you deserved it (41925)

On 10/11/2015 at 7:45am - kids - by Hank-T4 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mom texted me, asking what I'd like her to get for dinner tonight. I texted back "Something exotic if you're up for it :)". Except I accidentally typed "erotic". I only noticed the typo when I checked after getting no reply. She comes home in a couple of hours. Shit, shit, shit. FML

#21477344
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22030) - you deserved it (3830)

On 10/07/2015 at 10:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my hormones are so screwed, I popped a boner at the sight of two grasshoppers mating and had to retire to my room for a wank. FML

#21475435
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22608) - you deserved it (6355)

On 10/02/2015 at 5:01pm - intimacy - by sad-boing (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

#21470966
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29276) - you deserved it (2981)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to a gig. The drummer threw his drumsticks out at the end and I managed to catch one. With my face. Not only did I get a black eye, but the person next to me snatched the drumstick from my hands. FML

#21454163
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24081) - you deserved it (1745)

On 08/10/2015 at 4:32am - misc - by mildlyconcussed - Italy (Campania)

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

#21446710
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32546) - you deserved it (5765)

On 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by strangely - United States (California)

Today, while in the waiting room at the dentist's office, I looked up at the news on the TV to see my husband's mugshot. FML

#21443899
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28021) - you deserved it (2090)

On 07/19/2015 at 5:02am - misc - by wtf did he do - United States (Alaska)

Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML

#21443580
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23056) - you deserved it (2983)

On 07/18/2015 at 3:08pm - kids - by ddhaley1 (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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