Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lilyum

Offline (the 05/16/2015 at 5:49am) | Search for a member

Lilyum

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1848
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Lilyum's page activity

Visits<b>jman5415</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 10:49am<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 10:13pm<b>Osmoses</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 2:41am<b>Kandi_Neko</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 4:28pm<b>ohaidereitszeex3</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 11:00pm<b>chandlerbelacic</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 11:29am<b>Shmatterhorn</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 4:45pm<b>graceh58</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 8:38pm<b>Marmarfarfar</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 1:17am<b>lilahlov</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 1:05am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 7:46pm

Lilyum's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Lilyum's badges

Lilyum's favorite FMLs

Today, I was doing a job for some people on my street cutting their bushes. After I had finished and went to get my pay, I realized I had gone to the wrong house. They called the police. FML

#12136195
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11864) - you deserved it (26087)

On 07/27/2010 at 12:38am - work - by uugnfg - United States

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

#11989675
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61186) - you deserved it (3785)

On 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States

Today, I got called a f***ing b**ch by one of my students. I teach kindergarten. FML

#10851356
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45333) - you deserved it (6583)

On 05/29/2010 at 10:36pm - work - by love_today - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I learnt that the people I work with dislike me so much that they have a competition to see who can accidentally hurt me the most. How did I find out? A chef poured boiling water over my hands, and another shouted "50 POINTS!" FML

#9067691
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36187) - you deserved it (6238)

On 03/14/2010 at 5:09am - misc - by Cooky (man) - United Kingdom (Calderdale)

Today, my boss fired me because "I didn't get the right kind of coffee beans." FML

#8837670
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23268) - you deserved it (3436)

On 03/05/2010 at 12:23am - work - by koletatlow19 - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my best friend planned a birthday party for me at the local Mexican restaurant. NO ONE showed up. We told the Mexican waiter there would be 18 arriving. Two hours later he brought me free ice cream. Even the non-english speaking waiters knew I was a loser. FML

#7600805
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30111) - you deserved it (3441)

On 01/26/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Candace - United States

Today, I got yelled at by one of my bosses. The reason? I was yawning. I work at Starbucks. Apparently I wasn't 'promoting' correctly. FML

#7467721
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25300) - you deserved it (4286)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:29am - work - by nichaneely (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29255) - you deserved it (3831)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)

Today, a woman pushed me at the bar and told me how much she's always hated me. She was my grade five teacher. FML

#6812281
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30190) - you deserved it (3383)

On 12/18/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by flurina (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to call 911. Why? My fireplace caught on fire. FML

#6753816
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23468) - you deserved it (6068)

On 12/14/2009 at 7:00pm - misc - by fire - United States

Today, I received my camera in the mail. I had sent it back to the company because it wouldn't turn on. As I was reading the note they put in, it said, "Battery was put in backwards. No other problems found." FML

#6680274
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6299) - you deserved it (43672)

On 12/09/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by her0x3her0ine617 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML

#6563359
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51432) - you deserved it (3745)

On 12/02/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by errrmkl46 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out that my 2 week Christmas vacation my boss was talking about wasn't for this year, but 2010. I spent the day with my husband cancelling flights to Florida, and explaning to my 8 year old why we were not going to Disney World. FML

#6557406
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34072) - you deserved it (4560)

On 12/01/2009 at 8:32pm - work - by mylifesucks (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48423) - you deserved it (3164)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, I felt dizzy and light-headed. So I sat down at the top of my stairs calling my brother who was downstairs, for help because I was scared something was wrong with me. He called back "No, I'm eating." I fainted. When I woke up, I was still alone upstairs and he was still eating downstairs. FML

#6436663
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28665) - you deserved it (3132)

On 11/24/2009 at 3:07pm - health - by Foodcomesfirst (woman) - United Kingdom



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: