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Lilyum's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Lilyum's favorite FMLs
by uugnfg / 07/27/2010 at 12:38am / United States / Work
by thanksmom / 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by love_today / 05/29/2010 at 10:36pm / Canada (Quebec) / Work
Today, I learnt that the people I work with dislike me so much that they have a competition to see who can accidentally hurt me the most. How did I find out? A chef poured boiling water over my hands, and another shouted "50 POINTS!" FML
by Cooky / 03/14/2010 at 5:09am / United Kingdom (Calderdale) / Work
by koletatlow19 / 03/05/2010 at 12:23am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Work
Today, my best friend planned a birthday party for me at the local Mexican restaurant. NO ONE showed up. We told the Mexican waiter there would be 18 arriving. Two hours later he brought me free ice cream. Even the non-english speaking waiters knew I was a loser. FML
by Candace / 01/26/2010 at 10:31pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by nichaneely / 01/21/2010 at 12:29am / United States (Tennessee) / Work
by brileyyyy / 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm / United States (Missouri) / Health
by flurina / 12/18/2009 at 3:44pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by fire / 12/14/2009 at 7:00pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I received my camera in the mail. I had sent it back to the company because it wouldn't turn on. As I was reading the note they put in, it said, "Battery was put in backwards. No other problems found." FML
by her0x3her0ine617 / 12/09/2009 at 1:12pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by errrmkl46 / 12/02/2009 at 1:25am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my 2 week Christmas vacation my boss was talking about wasn't for this year, but 2010. I spent the day with my husband cancelling flights to Florida, and explaning to my 8 year old why we were not going to Disney World. FML
by mylifesucks / 12/01/2009 at 8:32pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Work
Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML
by annonymous / 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I felt dizzy and light-headed. So I sat down at the top of my stairs calling my brother who was downstairs, for help because I was scared something was wrong with me. He called back "No, I'm eating." I fainted. When I woke up, I was still alone upstairs and he was still eating downstairs. FML
by Foodcomesfirst / 11/24/2009 at 3:07pm / United Kingdom / Health
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…
- Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he played with and named my boobs. Complete with a full… Today, I just had a phone interview with a college. The lady asked me to spell out my password to a… Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I…