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Lilyum's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Lilyum's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/11/2012 at 1:29am / United States (Texas) / Work
by magicman / 07/04/2012 at 5:04am / United States / Health
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
by DwarfFrog / 06/18/2012 at 7:38am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/24/2012 at 12:59am / United States (Texas) / Work
Today, after a little detective work, I found out the money that recently went missing from my college fund was transferred by my mother, to her own account. She claims it's to pay a parking ticket. Maybe I'm just stupid, but I didn't know they fined people over $3,500 for a parking violation. FML
by Anonymous / 05/13/2012 at 6:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Money
by Anonymous / 04/29/2012 at 5:45am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous
by mark807 / 04/28/2012 at 2:52am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I've now received my 73rd email in two days about my masters group project on policy recommendations for security reform. One group member has helpfully rewritten everything, and our project is now titled "Zeus's Earthly Kingdom." It's due today. FML
by IHateGroupProjects / 04/25/2012 at 9:25am / United States (Maryland) / Work
Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML
by Anonymous / 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by rubberduckie94 / 04/06/2012 at 9:17am / United States / Animals
Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML
by scaredshitless / 03/03/2012 at 8:55am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Miscellaneous
by mary / 02/21/2012 at 10:33am / Australia / Health
by Anonymous / 02/19/2012 at 9:42pm / United States / Work
Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML
by Anonymous / 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
by lol / 01/25/2012 at 10:54am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
- Today, my crush got together with a dude on my 18th birthday party after I tried my best to win her… Today while walking to the shop under the blistering African sun, I stepped on something that stuck… Today my fiancee and I were having sex, it was lovely and we both were really into it. I decided to…