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Lilxpie

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Lilxpie
  • Town/Country : Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 11 June 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 223
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Lilxpie : ☆♡ I love anime! ♥★

Lilxpie's last visitors

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Lilxpie's favorite FMLs

Today, something ran across my foot while I was on the toilet. Hearing me scream, my husband ran in. We now have a new "pet" mouse named Jerry that I am not allowed to kill under threat of divorce. FML

Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be my wingman and help me get a date with a girl I really liked. I told him my plan, and as I finished and turned to go to her, I noticed her standing right there, listening in on the whole conversation. FML

#21055088
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39145) - you deserved it (10836)

On 02/09/2014 at 2:12am - love - by look before you speak - United States

Today, I check my phone regularly for calls or texts from her. I take her out to eat frequently, and we sleep in the same bed sometimes. Today I realized the closest thing I have to a boyfriend is my grandma. FML

#21054270
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35631) - you deserved it (5944)

On 02/08/2014 at 10:12am - misc - by grandma - United States (Georgia)

Today, I dreamed that Robert Downey Jr. kept flirting with me and asking me out. Each time, I refused him, because I'm taken. When I proudly told my boyfriend, he said, "What the hell? I could've kissed the mouth that kissed the Iron Man!" FML

#21049393
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38558) - you deserved it (7452)

On 02/03/2014 at 3:11pm - love - by Can't Believe It. - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after years of insomnia and going to doctors to help get a regular sleeping pattern, I finally fell asleep without the help of medication, only to dream about being chased by an angry seal and singing to Rihanna with a horse. This is probably why I don't sleep. FML

#21049132
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39919) - you deserved it (3694)

On 02/03/2014 at 8:29am - health - by Sleepless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, as usual, I stress ate. After having my exams prolonged for an extra week, I ate three extremely large packs of Skittles, and then threw them all up. Taste the rainbow, puke the rainbow. FML

#21048665
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36814) - you deserved it (13615)

On 02/02/2014 at 10:26pm - health - by Sad Student - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my Axe shampoo, body wash, and deodorant finally did their job: they got a girl to notice me. Too bad the girl was my grandma. FML

#21047196
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34180) - you deserved it (11053)

On 02/01/2014 at 1:37pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

#21043704
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40439) - you deserved it (10149)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

#21041278
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39775) - you deserved it (11622)

On 01/26/2014 at 11:37pm - work - by sabz21 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was reading FML's birthday blog post and saw a picture of myself in it. I would've been happy if it wasn't #4 in the list of worst duckfaces of the week. FML

#21040870
169 comments

Today, I noticed my laptop kept shutting down and the mouse cursor was all over the place, clicking on every folder. I dismantled the entire computer only to notice something in one of my USB drives: the receiver to a wireless mouse my colleague put there earlier to play a prank on me. 5ML

#21037915
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33147) - you deserved it (6952)

On 01/24/2014 at 2:16am - work - by Kenny (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, I decided to dye my hair blue. The result is slightly different than I expected: my white bathroom is now blue, and so are my skin and nails. The only thing that isn't blue is my hair, which is now green. FML

#21036650
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38273) - you deserved it (18295)

On 01/22/2014 at 10:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after trying for several days to change some details on the social security website, I got fed up and called them. I waited nearly two hours on hold, and when I finally got through, the guy on the other end just told me to reboot my computer and try again, then hung up on me. FML

#21027789
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41528) - you deserved it (3896)

On 01/14/2014 at 4:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to skip class to attend a truancy court hearing. FML

#21027645
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32013) - you deserved it (15664)

On 01/14/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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