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Life_is_FML

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Life_is_FML

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 February 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3516
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 64 posted

About Life_is_FML : I mainly enjoy playing video games (mass effect, fallout, Assasins' creed, etc) as well as playing the saxophone.

Life_is_FML's page activity

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Life_is_FML's favorite FMLs

Today, my soon-to-be stepson, 13, decided that he and I needed to spend "more quality time" together. His idea? We should start "bonding" by taking a bath together. When I said no, he told me I was being unfair, and that if I really loved him, I'd do it. FML

#19999925
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31697) - you deserved it (2470)

On 08/03/2012 at 4:21am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the only reason why I haven't had a relationship last for more than a week the past 4 years is because of my stalker ex-girlfriend, who has been keeping other women out of my life by making up horrible stories about me. She broke up with me 5 years ago. FML

#19804016
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27776) - you deserved it (1923)

On 06/17/2012 at 9:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39016) - you deserved it (6196)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, I was trying to take my shirt off. It was an awkward fit, so I had to basically wrestle it for five minutes. The kicker was that I was giving my boyfriend a striptease. He laughed so hard and for so long that we never had sex. FML

#19739017
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24628) - you deserved it (7284)

On 06/05/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Damn (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

#19584401
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13500) - you deserved it (172706)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm - intimacy - by T3STI (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML

#19504672
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26656) - you deserved it (4601)

On 04/21/2012 at 2:15am - misc - by wmkaz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML

#19460491
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11874) - you deserved it (29596)

On 04/13/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I went to my Christian accountability partner from church to talk about continuing to maintain Christian values. We had sex. Oh, the irony. FML

#19409993
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10111) - you deserved it (40328)

On 04/05/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Badchristian (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18822) - you deserved it (31920)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML

#18811640
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39026) - you deserved it (3512)

On 01/15/2012 at 1:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading". FML

#18283192
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43174) - you deserved it (6085)

On 11/18/2011 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty, when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here." from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML

#17657818
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37531) - you deserved it (7523)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:16am - misc - by Pizza-less - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64863) - you deserved it (6765)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, is the anniversary of my cat's death, so I went to visit her grave in the pet cemetery. Someone had spray-painted "Your cat sucks" on her grave. FML

#16350161
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49896) - you deserved it (11007)

On 05/25/2011 at 10:48pm - animals - by nrelavender - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I confronted my husband about him being unfaithful. He said his reasons were because he's just not attracted to me anymore and my current weight repulses him. I'm six months pregnant with his child. FML

#15784474
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60891) - you deserved it (4308)

On 04/14/2011 at 2:28pm - love - by Pregnant (woman) - United States (Florida)



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