Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lianess

Offline (yesterday at 8:04am) | Search for a member

Lianess

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 265
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Lianess : Welcome to my profile and stuff.. I don't really know what to write...

Lianess's page activity

Visits<b>Sethan01</b> - yesterday at 2:33pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 12:59pm<b>Peter_Ohnigian</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 9:24am<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:32pm<b>Jonesy272</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 3:14am<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 2:45am<b>daneyboy</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 1:25pm<b>perfectionz</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:36pm<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 7:10pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 2:36am<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:57pm<b>Corey122726</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:52pm<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 11:44am<b>DenverTyrrell</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 12:11pm<b>TheSwegMaster69</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 11:08am<b>saba_ajira</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 8:37am<b>victoria63</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 1:24am<b>Spencyy</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 12:14am

Liked!<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:57am<b>daneyboy</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 6:49am

Lianess's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Lianess's badges

Lianess's favorite FMLs

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

#21336619
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32633) - you deserved it (5240)

On 01/13/2015 at 8:50pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, my little brother learned about mortality when our dog died. Since then, he's gone a little nuts and keeps ranting that he sees no point as to why our other dog should live. He's 16. FML

#21306062
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28794) - you deserved it (2289)

On 11/26/2014 at 7:09am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my mother locked me out of the house. Why? The dog and her needed some time to talk. FML

#21285216
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31468) - you deserved it (2375)

On 10/25/2014 at 8:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

#21279992
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29059) - you deserved it (3080)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by KayyElOh94 - United States

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48830) - you deserved it (8873)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML

#20879220
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44595) - you deserved it (4915)

On 09/13/2013 at 1:55am - work - by ellen77 - United States (California)

Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML

#16908147
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10189) - you deserved it (78078)

On 06/29/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by ashleyrae (woman) - United States (Mississippi)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: