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LardyMcLard

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LardyMcLard

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 12 September 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 104
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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LardyMcLard's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

#20818422
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60936) - you deserved it (5979)

On 08/03/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by zackeryburch - United States (California)

Today, a customer pulled a knife on me after I informed him that we'd run out of avocados to put on his pizza. FML

#20815101
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46705) - you deserved it (3367)

On 08/01/2013 at 11:18am - work - by are these people even HUMAN? (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57331) - you deserved it (6792)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59692) - you deserved it (21047)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, the weather was so hot that I couldn't stop sweating profusely while using the restroom. Ever slipped off the toilet seat and hit the floor hard due to ass-sweat? Not a pleasant experience. FML

#20750694
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47578) - you deserved it (5892)

On 06/27/2013 at 4:27pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

#20742609
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60110) - you deserved it (3933)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck (man) - Guam

Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML

#20741232
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51177) - you deserved it (11901)

On 06/22/2013 at 4:55pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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