KoGWitness

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KoGWitness

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 18 August 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 928
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About KoGWitness : Willing to try and find a girlfriend.
In my photo, I am on the right.

KoGWitness's page activity

Visits<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 5:57pm<b>trembly</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 2:14pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 9:15pm<b>marbles123</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 5:36pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 5:08pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 11:16pm<b>BlueMoonCafe</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 6:43pm<b>larson15</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 4:33pm<b>bodybuilder1564</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 8:46am<b>abbeyXD</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 5:45pm<b>muzicizlife2012</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 7:05pm<b>PowerF</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 11:01pm<b>HeatherFeatherB</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 9:53am<b>Love_sosa</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 7:28am<b>DollyDope</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 2:23am<b>JessBassett</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 10:58pm<b>sillybilly132</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 10:52pm<b>SydneyGrey</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 5:32pm

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KoGWitness's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, after buying 3 new alarm clocks, I finally decided to video tape myself all night to figure out if my alarm clock was broken or if I was oversleeping. Turns out I wake up around 4am each day and turn them off without remembering. FML

by sleepy momma / 06/02/2013 at 2:06am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

by life insurance for 1 / 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

by more than I wanted to know / 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm / Italy (Emilia-Romagna) / Intimacy

Today, my mom decided to subtly bring up her desire for grandchildren. "You really need a girlfriend. I'm surprised you don't have a crippling case of Carpal Tunnel by now." FML

by alittlepersonal / 10/05/2012 at 1:59am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the shower, when I heard my daughter scream and shout, "Mommy, mommy! Help! Come quick!" I panicked and rushed downstairs without even looking for a towel to cover myself, all so I could find out she'd just gotten a piece of dirt on her shoe. FML

by Sh*t / 07/02/2012 at 5:17pm / Venezuela (Distrito Federal) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend finally met my brother. He arrested him for drunk driving. FML

by daniella101 / 06/28/2012 at 2:11pm / United States (Louisiana) / Love

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML

by C0r1nn3 / 06/07/2012 at 12:02am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend decided to pleasure me with a handjob. It was incredibly painful because she didn't understand that my foreskin isn't as flexible as she thought it to be. I didn't have the heart to tell her to stop until she asked, "Is it supposed to turn this color?" FML

by purple / 03/24/2012 at 1:30am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my sister's boyfriend said the only thing he'd change about her was her last name. My boyfriend told me he'd change the shape of my nose. FML

by disappoint / 12/08/2011 at 4:14am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

by Artic / 04/12/2011 at 12:00am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2011 at 1:15pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 1:24am / France / Intimacy

Today, I spent a wonderful day with my girlfriend. I got her everything she wanted, and drained my wallet. On the walk home she noticed a license plate that had an ex-girlfriend's name on it. She saw me looking and accused me of still being in love with my ex, and stormed off. After throwing salad in my face. FML

by MetalAtlas / 03/01/2010 at 10:31pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend gave me a really sweet poem that he wrote for me. I think it was secondhand - the first letter of each verse spelled his ex girlfriend's name. FML

by blaze / 02/16/2010 at 7:00pm / United States (Arizona) / Love