Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Kirito_Kazuto

Search for a member

Kirito_Kazuto
  • Town/Country : Sword Art Online, Floor 45
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2532
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Kirito_Kazuto : Nothing interesting/Updated

(Hi! "D(-^n ^-)o To those who may be curious to learn about me & are currently reading this at the moment; at first when you see me, I may seem extremely shy... but if you ever get the chance to really know me, then you'd be surprised! :3
- I use Skype, Snap-Chat, and Kik
- If you're wondering what they are, just ask & I'd be happy enough to give you them (-^ ~ ^-)
- Please, don't be shy--& just message me if you want to chat and/or like to learn more about me. (-^n ^ -)
(By the way, I'm straight, extremely weird & also have terrible eye bags/ dark circles under my eyes.
- Other than that; I love to play video games, & watch Anime & I'm proud of it~

YEEE~!
*~B R O H - F I S T~!*~~/(-> wl-)/)

Kirito_Kazuto's last visitors

SweetSwedemichaelf461tuckitMelTheGreatChenEightybluucatSp1k3FMLkansahsagemarie209WubStep_Ghost_KaulitzGurnir

Kirito_Kazuto's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of Kirito_Kazuto's badges

Kirito_Kazuto's favorite FMLs

Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML

#21097985
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39736) - you deserved it (5600)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm - love - by oops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting in the coffee shop where my boyfriend and I used to go before he broke up with me about a week ago. I was missing him and wishing he was there, when all of a sudden this 14-year-old kid comes up to me and says, "He's not coming, you may as well go home." FML

#21097979
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39971) - you deserved it (5432)

On 03/27/2014 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, after years of frustration, I got a t-shirt printed that says, "I am a girl". FML

#21097950
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33700) - you deserved it (4748)

On 03/27/2014 at 6:34pm - misc - by mookiemookie01 (woman) -

Today, a bee flew into my classroom and landed on my cheek. Not only am I allergic to these things, I was hit in the face with a textbook to "make sure it's dead." FML

Today, I found out that, after having moved over 500 miles to begin a post-graduate degree, I'm being kicked out of the house I'm renting. We haven't yet signed agreements. Apparently I "keep the kitchen too clean". FML

#21097212
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36330) - you deserved it (2930)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm - work - by homeless - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I found out that, after having moved over 500 miles to begin a post-graduate degree, I'm being kicked out of the house I'm renting. We haven't yet signed agreements. Apparently I "keep the kitchen too clean". FML

#21097212
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36330) - you deserved it (2930)

On 03/26/2014 at 7:45pm - work - by homeless - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I told my boyfriend the dentist said my blood pressure was high. He was more interested in the fact that the dentist took my blood pressure than my blood pressure being high. FML

#21095607
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31039) - you deserved it (8702)

On 03/24/2014 at 10:11pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

#21095586
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35814) - you deserved it (2493)

On 03/24/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Vampprobs - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized how sad my life is when for my 18th birthday, I went to a strip club, by myself, in GTA V. FML

#21092916
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39047) - you deserved it (7025)

On 03/21/2014 at 7:42pm - misc - by BMTH2296 (man) - United States

Today, my dad took me to a bar for my first legal drink. He quickly got "drunk" and started slurring that I was an accident, saying the only reason I'm alive is because he'd been too poor to pay for an abortion. As I started crying, he burst out laughing and said soberly, "Just kidding, son." FML

#21092859
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41719) - you deserved it (5194)

On 03/21/2014 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

#21092834
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36723) - you deserved it (2741)

On 03/21/2014 at 5:44pm - health - by iusedprotectionanyway (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML

#21092226
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40444) - you deserved it (2686)

On 03/20/2014 at 11:04pm - misc - by nehadrihan - United States (California)

Today, for the third time this week, a random person in the street walked up to me and told me how much I look like Grumpy Cat. FML

#21091998
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33803) - you deserved it (4546)

On 03/20/2014 at 6:18pm - misc - by no (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML

#21091940
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15618) - you deserved it (59921)

On 03/20/2014 at 5:03pm - misc - by screwed (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out why my dad always treated me badly as a kid compared to my siblings. It's because I was conceived while my mom was cheating on him. On top of that, he made it clear that he still doesn't consider me a "real" part of the family. FML

#21091901
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48551) - you deserved it (2568)

On 03/20/2014 at 4:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: