About Kirito_Kazuto : Nothing interesting
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You've liked someone. How cute!
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
Kirito_Kazuto's favorite FMLs
Today, my father passed away. I called my boss to let him know about the situation. His only response before hanging up: "Shit, dude. Well, I'll see you in the morning, these reports won't write themselves." FML
by Anonymous / 05/23/2015 at 10:50am / Canada (Alberta) / Work
by Vexatious / 05/22/2015 at 12:27pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by xolaurennnn / 05/22/2015 at 11:55am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I bought my first vibrator. I was really excited, until my crippling OCD kicked in, forcing me to turn it on and off seven times in rapid succession, causing it to give off a cracking sound and stop working. Now I'm sad. FML
by Anonymous / 05/19/2015 at 10:01am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy
by fuckingdonuts / 05/17/2015 at 10:54pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/15/2015 at 7:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by that was mine / 05/15/2015 at 6:26pm / United States (New Jersey) / Money
by semokco / 05/14/2015 at 2:59pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML
by Bonnie and Clyde / 05/07/2015 at 10:18pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I was out with my youngest cousin and we had to stop for gas. Since he just got his license, I asked if he wanted to pump the gas while I went into the station to get snacks and pay. He pumped my car full of diesel. FML
by Anonymous / 05/07/2015 at 11:45am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation
Today, my boss told me I ask too many questions and that's why they cut my hours in half. Officially, I'm a "Pharmacy Technician in Training", which means I'm trying to teach myself how to do the job without killing someone. All from on the job experience and an outdated textbook. FML
by PharmSlave / 05/01/2015 at 2:12am / United States (Washington) / Work
by sianydiddle / 04/30/2015 at 6:36pm / Intimacy
by nerderer / 04/30/2015 at 2:48pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
by Anonymous / 04/28/2015 at 12:58pm / United Kingdom (Devon) / Intimacy
by PPP / 04/28/2015 at 11:05am / United States / Miscellaneous
- Today, I've spent nearly three weeks indulging my boyfriend's weird fetish, where he wears a hockey… Today, while reading an erotic story I was more excited that the author used a conjunctive adverb… Today, I just found my husband on Craigslist. He's working away from home, and he's looking to give…