King_paradox

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Offline (the 10/05/2015 at 1:21am)

King_paradox

1Fucked!

King_paradoxKing_paradox
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 April 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14057
  • Number of comments : 108
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About King_paradox : I'm a wizim

=E=

It's a wizim thing

King_paradox's page activity

Visits<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:55am<b>Capitan</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 5:03pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 2:37am<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 2:09pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 12:01pm<b>kobrien1369</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 10:01am<b>LoverWordsFood</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 6:55am<b>_DILYNN_</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 2:17pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 6:17pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 8:16pm<b>EvanescenceLuv</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 3:37pm<b>groovy579</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 5:51am<b>mitchumcrew</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:52am<b>CrumpledQuill</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 1:23am<b>enddmd</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 11:02pm<b>Suchadiva</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 9:10pm<b>7382929</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 8:09pm<b>blueblu97</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 6:40pm

Fucked!<b>enddmd</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:03am

King_paradox's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of King_paradox's badges

King_paradox's favorite FMLs

Today, my self-esteem hit rock bottom when I was intimidated by a 10-year-old. I'm 23. FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2014 at 6:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date. I took her out to an expensive steak house. When she was done eating, she got up, said she was married, and told me she only accepted the date because I'd be paying for it. FML

by steak through the heart / 11/18/2014 at 1:57pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

by drugsforthugs / 11/18/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to endure my father going on a sexist rant about how women shouldn't be allowed to go to university because it's "unrealistic" since "all women" become stay-at-home mums. This is the same man who threatened to kick me out if I dropped out of uni. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2014 at 10:44pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I sat my son down for a talk about how he's been too lazy to brush his teeth lately. I said "Son, we need to have a chat about oral hygiene." He rolled his eyes, sighed, and said he already knew to clean "it" before a girl went down on him, and asked if he could go already. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2014 at 1:23pm / Kids

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he got up and said he needed to go home because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV. That's what we were doing. FML

by really / 11/06/2014 at 7:30pm / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend came home from college for the first time in weeks just to visit me. I was so excited that I spent two hours getting ready. Turns out he was only coming back to dump me. Now I'm single and out of foundation. FML

by single pringle / 11/04/2014 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I overheard my son mutter to himself, "If Hitler could do it to that many people, so could I..." Anyone recommend a good psychiatrist? FML

by failure / 11/02/2014 at 3:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

by jay-frey96 / 11/02/2014 at 10:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2014 at 2:23pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

by MySonThePoet / 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, I dressed up in my nicest clothes and spent ages putting makeup on before going to a nightclub, hoping to meet someone nice. The only person who acknowledged me was a guy who yelled, "Hey, wanna fuck?! Not like anyone else would ever touch you, am I right?!" FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2014 at 11:06am / Mexico (Nuevo Leon) / Love

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

by Australian Lifeguard / 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2014 at 11:49am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I came out as bisexual to my friends via group message. They didn't respond; I had a panic attack. An hour later, one of my friends texted back, "k". FML

by adirom / 10/20/2014 at 10:25pm / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.