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Kandyland

Offline (the 04/15/2015 at 8:11am) | Search for a member

Kandyland

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 18 March 1984 (31 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5315
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Kandyland : My life is completely f*ed.

Kandyland's page activity

Visits<b>poncho55</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Budderchook</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Tempted1</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 10:02am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 5:56pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 09/12/2011 at 3:24am<b>pinklover24</b> - the 02/09/2011 at 6:46pm<b>FFML_314</b> - the 01/27/2011 at 12:29am<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 4:28pm<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 12/30/2010 at 3:22am

Kandyland's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Kandyland's badges

Kandyland's favorite FMLs

Today, when my girlfriend woke me up, she said, "I just had the sexiest dream." Thinking she was feeling frisky, I started to try to fool around with her. She pulled away and said, "Well it wasn't about YOU." FML

#12100553
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35161) - you deserved it (5244)

On 07/25/2010 at 7:09am - intimacy - by girlgirlinsanity (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I lifted up my blinds, only for them to detach from the wall, hit me on the head, knock a pile of paper over, spill a can of Pepsi, leave plaster all over the floor and a gaping hole in the wall above my window. FML

#12043060
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32606) - you deserved it (3899)

On 07/22/2010 at 11:10am - misc - by Elliot (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, while lifeguarding, I saw someone in the wave-pool who appeared to be drowning. So, I jumped in to attempt to save him. Turns out he wasn't drowning, he only had one arm. He yelled at me. FML

#12042807
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32429) - you deserved it (4507)

On 07/22/2010 at 10:48am - work - by GuardOtto - United States

Today, I had an interview. I didn't get the job because apparently customers might not understand me, since I "talk too good." I just graduated with an English degree. FML

#11808834
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33854) - you deserved it (3074)

On 07/11/2010 at 10:44am - work - by alejandro38 - United States (New York)

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

#9721953
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25327) - you deserved it (56357)

On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my shrink diagnosed me as severely depressive, due to a lot of stress and yells at home. After the session, my parents argued about whose fault it was and then went on to yell at me for being depressive and wasting their money. FML

#9647002
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41511) - you deserved it (3519)

On 04/05/2010 at 6:14am - misc - by blah. - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, I was in my room, in my briefs and texting my girlfriend. Suddenly, I got a massive erection and I decided to take a picture to send her. As soon as my camera phone clicked, my mom walked in. You can see my mom in the picture screaming at me. FML

#8861010
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9951) - you deserved it (28690)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:10am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I brought my best friend to my uncle's birthday party. We were having a great time until my grandmother walked up to us and said to me, "You sure have a nice looking boyfriend." My friend is a girl. She has cancer and lost all of her hair due to chemotherapy. FML

#8690586
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39157) - you deserved it (2085)

On 02/27/2010 at 2:03pm - health - by hairplease (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML

#8488357
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30444) - you deserved it (3736)

On 02/20/2010 at 7:03pm - kids - by Scaryman (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20639) - you deserved it (4730)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

#8099934
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10505) - you deserved it (23131)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:07pm - misc - by squishy - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

#8099934
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10505) - you deserved it (23131)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:07pm - misc - by squishy - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mother machine-washed a suit I rented for a friends wedding, despite me informing her that it was dry-clean only, and that the store would take care of it. I now owe $1600 to replace the suit, and my mum is refusing to help pay, as she was "only trying to help." FML

#7514878
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33573) - you deserved it (2723)

On 01/23/2010 at 1:40am - love - by Phoenix - Sent from mobile version

Today, a man I don't know came up to me and started screaming about how "all you damn Mexicans were stealing American's jobs" and he stormed off. I'm Native American, and I'm pretty sure we've been here longer. FML

#7482237
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52278) - you deserved it (4148)

On 01/21/2010 at 7:45pm - misc - by hardtotell (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. And then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him. Giving me the evil eye. FML

#7467735
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32718) - you deserved it (2572)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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