KandyK16

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Offline (the 12/31/2014 at 5:40am)

KandyK16

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 October 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 21256
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About KandyK16 : .

KandyK16's page activity

Visits<b>meganu</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 3:39pm<b>darkjosh05</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 6:49pm<b>ameliaaa4</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 5:30pm<b>emxy92</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 9:24pm<b>jips5793</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 2:05pm<b>Linda_zlk</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 5:49am<b>mzrayray</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 7:17pm<b>Claytonioo</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 11:45pm<b>Weiss729</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 10:49am<b>tifdunc</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 11:02pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 9:39am<b>averbell</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 9:26pm<b>w0o0a</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 8:53pm<b>mweb8416</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 7:53pm<b>jff1998</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 6:03pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 4:36pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 3:47pm<b>0void0</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 11:52pm

KandyK16's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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KandyK16's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML

by joe / 06/23/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, I was told by a friend that my girlfriend has been cheating on me. Her defence was that if I had a bigger dick she wouldn't have been, in her words, forced to go elsewhere for sex. My mother's response when I confided this in her: "Ask me if I care." FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2013 at 3:19pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

by o_O / 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2013 at 6:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

by our kids will be derps / 06/22/2013 at 3:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 2:39am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, my drunk dad decided to wake me up by lobbing our cat directly into my now-mauled face. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 4:38pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Animals

Today, I came back from the doctor after having been diagnosed with a UTI. My dad now won't shut up about it, saying stuff like, "You must be 'pissed'", "Looks like 'urine' a bit of pain", and "'Urea'-lly need some antibiotics, son", all while making obnoxious finger quotes in the air. FML

by assholedad / 06/21/2013 at 2:05pm / United States (Ohio) / Health

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

by lehonj49 / 06/21/2013 at 12:10pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I again had to quietly sneak in through my bedroom window. I don't live with my parents. I go through my window because my cat thinks everyone who walks in through the door at night is a burglar or something and attacks them. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 10:28am / United States / Animals

Today, I honked at a man in a Subway parking lot. He rolled down his window and screamed insults and slurs at me before driving away. Why did I honk at him? He'd left his lunch on top of his car. FML

by just trying to be nice / 06/20/2013 at 10:17pm / United States (Arizona) / Transportation

Today, while having sex with my husband, he accidentally elbowed me in the face. I don't know which is worse: that he didn't stop to see if I was OK, or that it seemed to turn him on and he climaxed immediately after he'd hit me. FML

by naughtymommy0317 / 06/20/2013 at 4:47am / United States / Intimacy

Today, a customer broke my nose for refusing to give him a discount because the product he was buying had a fine layer of dust on the box. FML

by Whytetrash / 06/20/2013 at 2:32am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I was eating lunch when my grandmother came over and started watching me. Suddenly she said, "I see you're getting breasts". I'm a guy. FML

by ohmygod / 06/20/2013 at 1:49am / United States / Miscellaneous