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KalCountry76

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KalCountry76
  • Town/Country : Menzoberranzan, Forgotten Realms
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 June 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1102
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About KalCountry76 : Fantasy Nerd

KalCountry76's last visitors

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KalCountry76's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of KalCountry76's badges

KalCountry76's favorite FMLs

Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27268) - you deserved it (5311)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML

#20501864
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19897) - you deserved it (8732)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19am - love - by mr_loveless (man) - United States

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

#20494543
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34032) - you deserved it (3008)

On 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm - misc - by Experience (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28094) - you deserved it (1782)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24739) - you deserved it (4861)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

#20165510
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31268) - you deserved it (3170)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went out for a few drinks with some friends. All night, I kept smiling and showing off my newly brace-free teeth. Later on, one of my friends drunkly asked, "Why does she keep smiling? Her teeth are fucking jacked." FML

#20122439
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15818) - you deserved it (1676)

On 10/18/2012 at 12:26pm - health - by murp (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

#20083631
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18887) - you deserved it (8431)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband and I were watching Lord of the Rings. My husband told me he sees the eye of Sauron every time he goes down on me. FML

#19986172
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21757) - you deserved it (3246)

On 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by LOTRfail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I auditioned for the role of Rizzo in a local production of Grease. The director told me I wasn't tough enough, and that my persona too sweet and childlike for the part. I asked if I should instead try out to play Sandy. He replied "I was being nice. Honestly, you're ugly and can't act." FML

#19952455
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21012) - you deserved it (3016)

On 07/18/2012 at 12:02am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML

#19939315
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28534) - you deserved it (4822)

On 07/15/2012 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I discovered that I'm adopted. How? After a great lunch, I asked my uncle how he'd made the salad dressing. He replied, "Haha! It's a secret family recipe, my dear!" I wouldn't have thought twice about it, were it not for my parents' shocked expressions, and the long, awkward silence. FML

#19901344
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23491) - you deserved it (1430) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/06/2012 at 6:14pm - misc - by Lyn (woman) - France

Today, I was having sex with the guy I've been in love with for years. I moaned, "say my name." He didn't know it. FML

#19873262
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30246) - you deserved it (9496)

On 06/30/2012 at 9:35pm - intimacy - by say my name -

Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML

#19853793
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5746) - you deserved it (22904)

On 06/27/2012 at 12:39am - misc - by deli Shoppe - United States (California)



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