About JoelsLastNight : I love movies, tv shows and music. I play guitar and drums. I also like to see everything as glass half full, or two sides to every story. I love to make people laugh.
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JoelsLastNight's favorite FMLs
by DeeDee / 02/04/2014 at 5:08pm / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
by eyes wide SHIT / 12/27/2013 at 8:37pm / Australia / Animals
Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML
by bleach bleach bleach / 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy
Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML
by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Kids
by confsused / 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Mary / 12/16/2013 at 12:14am / United States / Miscellaneous
by hi Mum / 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy
by scared shitless / 12/10/2013 at 4:50am / United States (California) / Work
by igotpride / 12/09/2013 at 4:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML
by Anonymous / 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by ballplaya52 / 12/08/2013 at 12:04am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that I take long enough showers for my boyfriend to sleep with my sister and put everything back to normal before I get out. I found out when I needed more shampoo that was in a shopping bag in my room. FML
by mystery / 12/07/2013 at 4:55pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy
Today, my 6-year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML
by john doe / 12/07/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids
by eastsiderounder / 12/02/2013 at 12:11pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
Today, my fiancé left me waiting at the train station for two and a half hours because he offered his ex-girlfriend a lift to her friends wedding that was a few cities away. I normally wouldn't have minded, but I'm 6 months pregnant and it was pouring with rain. FML
by ali456 / 12/01/2013 at 10:16am / United Kingdom (Dudley) / Love
- Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway.… Today, to get back at me for breaking up with him, my ex-boyfriend thought it would be really funny… Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I reached climax. While I was screaming, my 4 year old…