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JerseyItaliann

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JerseyItaliann
  • Town/Country : Jersey, 'murica
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 February 1999 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 139
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About JerseyItaliann : Emo kid, artist, Pegasister, Potterhead, Superman/Batman nerd, I love Soul Eater, Pokemon, Glee, Vampire Diaries, and Tim Burton movies (like every other emo in this world)
I'm addicted to Skyrim, I also play LoZ, Pokemon, Fable, L4D and COD; Black Ops, MW2, MW3, and Black Ops 2(soon):D Gamertag: Beckazzz
Message me if you want, but I probably won't answer because I'm usually on the app, but if you really want to talk to me my Kik is emopokemon, my Instagram is b1ackh0r1z0n, and my Deviant Art is emopokemon
I'm only 14 and I can be really stupid so if I don't understand something and I comment something really dumb, please be patient with me.

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JerseyItaliann's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47778) - you deserved it (3182) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML

#20451316
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25580) - you deserved it (10114)

On 01/10/2013 at 1:25am - love - by RP Havens (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I looked at my neighbor's empty lawn; he's an old guy and he usually has the best Christmas lights. We knew he might not be able to do them this year, so I felt bad and I did them for him. Later, a neighbor asked about them and I told her that I helped out. She said, "You do know he died, right?" FML

#20411217
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31178) - you deserved it (16784)

On 12/21/2012 at 11:00am - misc - by Syd - United States (Texas)

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when he suddenly grabbed my front. He said, in a sexy voice, "Is that your boob?". He had grabbed a fat roll. FML

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19499) - you deserved it (3704)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19499) - you deserved it (3704)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML

#20174722
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43537) - you deserved it (12885)

On 11/23/2012 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Embarassed (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, in break from tradition, I proposed to my boyfriend. We were at a Japanese Pagoda. Water was trickling everywhere; the moment was perfect. While I was on my knee, after pouring my heart out, he looked wistfully out over the water and said, "So, I was thinking pizza tonight." FML

#20173702
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21639) - you deserved it (4270)

On 11/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by but I tried anal and everything (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has secretly been conditioning me to get turned on by the smell of bananas. Guess whose new co-worker peels a nice, fragrant banana five times a day. FML

#20139261
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24930) - you deserved it (2431)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm - intimacy - by SadExperiment (man) - United States (California)

Today, I broke a nail at school. The edge kept getting caught on things, so I thought I could file it down by rubbing it on my jeans. Apparently it looked like I was doing something else, because I was called into the principal's office to discuss why "certain things" should be done in private. FML

#20139255
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26324) - you deserved it (4488)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad watched the news and decided to start preparing for Hurricane Sandy by buying $300 worth of long-life and canned food. We live in Australia. FML

#20138384
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23209) - you deserved it (1248)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:03am - misc - by StormSeason (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML

#20138170
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9203) - you deserved it (22849)

On 10/29/2012 at 1:46am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

#20113152
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24056) - you deserved it (1687)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

#17448380
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24768) - you deserved it (2452)

On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to Victoria's Secret to get fitted for a new bra since mine weren't fitting properly. To my amazement, I wasn't a 32A, but a 32AA. I might as well have craters on my chest. FML

#15103887
454 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28859) - you deserved it (4552)

On 02/24/2011 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)



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