Jarl_the_Elite

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Offline (the 09/15/2015 at 8:53am)

Jarl_the_Elite

1Fucked!

Jarl_the_EliteJarl_the_Elite
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 15249
  • Number of comments : 147
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Jarl_the_Elite : I like PI

Jarl_the_Elite's page activity

Visits<b>Goat_E_mom</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 11:37am<b>Spudnik</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 3:22pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 10:30am<b>kageboy</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 5:29pm<b>eggnog5000</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 11:50pm<b>skyeeskellington</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 4:44pm<b>Katerchen</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 1:46am<b>mzhaze</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 11:17pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 4:01pm<b>Tony_BigBologna</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:29pm<b>kaed</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 12:35pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 1:44pm<b>daken96</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:03am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 9:46am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 10:00am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 6:20am<b>Dide9872</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 1:49pm<b>bethjlster1999</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 5:30pm

Fucked!<b>Paws_Cat</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 8:32pm

Jarl_the_Elite's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Jarl_the_Elite's badges

Jarl_the_Elite's favorite FMLs

Today, the main file and backups of the book I've been writing for 2 and a half years mysteriously vanished. It turned out my mum decided that me spending so much time in my room must mean I'm watching porn, and so she trashed everything. FML

by 4lphab3t4 / 06/11/2015 at 10:37am / United Kingdom (Harrow) / Miscellaneous

Today, my professor let a guy into my philosophy class 30 minutes late because his excuse was, "Time is just an illusion." This is the same professor that kicked me out of the classroom for being 2 minutes late. FML

by Really / 06/09/2015 at 9:59pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Work

Today, my housemate got back at me for asking for her share of a bill by losing her virginity to the guy I like, very loudly. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2015 at 4:52pm / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, I left a concert with my drunk mother who had spilled beer all over my shirt. I drove her home and she slept it off. Later, my mom "found" my shirt in the laundry and grounded me for drinking behind her back. She won't believe me that it was her. FML

by MagnusDeus / 06/07/2015 at 11:46am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was choking on a popcorn kernel at the movie theater. Nobody helped me. The workers in there told me to leave because I was "disrupting the audience". FML

by MdMan2 / 06/03/2015 at 10:14pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was working on a project in my schools library when a group of teenagers came in and began loudly talking and laughing. When I asked them to please quiet down, the librarian asked me to leave for being too loud. FML

by NoUsernamHere / 06/03/2015 at 9:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML

by W T F / 06/03/2015 at 3:22am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, a customer complained that his earphones stopped properly functioning even though he bought them less than a month ago. After checking them, I realised that there was so much earwax caked into them that it affected the sound quality. FML

by iGagged / 06/01/2015 at 8:22am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to explain to my little sister that not all guitars are supposed to have a hole in them, that when I was talking about "breaking it in" I didn't mean I'd smash a hole in it, and that she shouldn't have taken a hammer to my expensive new guitar. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 3:18pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a promotional message offering a half-off deal on an expensive coffee maker. The only reason why I received the message is because I bought that same coffee maker yesterday and I signed up to their mailing list. FML

by FFS / 05/28/2015 at 1:41pm / Cyprus (Limassol) / Money

Today, one of my students tried to bribe me $200 to change his grade. When I said no and told him he was lucky I didn't report him, he went to the dean and told him I offered to change his grade for money. I'm now suspended and under investigation. FML

by UN4 / 05/27/2015 at 12:25pm / United States / Work

Today, my dad stood by and nodded in agreement as my sister told me that my clinical depression is "getting REALLY old." FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2015 at 9:39am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Health

Today, I had to write my own notice for enforced redundancy because my boss just went on a two week vacation. He told me to just forge his signature and that, if I wouldn't do it, he'd just make something up to dismiss me on codes of conduct. FML

Today, after being with my fiance for almost a decade, my future mother-in-law has been accusing me of being a gold digger because we want to buy a house together. She has conveniently forgotten her son was out of work for two years and I supported the both of us. FML

by BadGoldDigger / 05/26/2015 at 8:18am / United States / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was wrestling in a tournament. I was in the finals about to win when the kid threw up on me. They thought I'd hit him in the stomach hard enough to make him throw up, so they disqualified me. FML

by wrestling probs / 05/25/2015 at 10:24pm / United States / Miscellaneous