Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Jarl_the_Elite

Offline (the 05/25/2015 at 1:15pm) | Search for a member

Jarl_the_Elite

1Fucked!

Jarl_the_EliteJarl_the_Elite
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8903
  • Number of comments : 144
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Jarl_the_Elite : I like PI

Jarl_the_Elite's page activity

Visits<b>daken96</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 2:03am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 9:46am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 10:00am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 6:20am<b>arasx0</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:26pm<b>Dide9872</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 1:49pm<b>bethjlster1999</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 5:30pm<b>rockaroths</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 2:58pm<b>invadermaythe1st</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 11:40am<b>DrewJoeyPeyton</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 11:04pm<b>buckydargon</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 4:56am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 9:29am<b>mine___turtles10</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 11:40am<b>MarkSolo3</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 3:08pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 8:46am<b>Rallred32</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 9:32am<b>AMcM</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 1:50pm<b>Paws_Cat</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 2:32pm

Fucked!<b>Paws_Cat</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 8:32pm

Jarl_the_Elite's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Jarl_the_Elite's badges

Jarl_the_Elite's favorite FMLs

Today, I read my 10-year-old sister's diary. That's how I found out about her disturbingly detailed plan to murder me, make it look like suicide, date my boyfriend after helping him get over my death, then marry him. FML

#21395572
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38147) - you deserved it (4929)

On 04/18/2015 at 3:01am - kids - by Anonymus (woman) - Sweden

Today, I got into an argument with my racist brother after he opened his god damn stupid mouth in front of my girlfriend. He actually tried to convince me that he's not a racist, because one of his favorite types of porn is black girls getting fucked by white guys. FML

#21395531
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29319) - you deserved it (2476)

On 04/18/2015 at 12:57am - misc - by assault and imnotracistbuttery (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was trying to make a good impression with my fiancé's friends. After a few hours, I thought all was going well. As I walked to the washroom, I heard, "So what disability does she have? No one can be like that without something wrong in their brain." FML

#21395050
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29306) - you deserved it (2411)

On 04/17/2015 at 2:24am - love - by apparently_disabled - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I tripped while rushing to my classes. In a desperate attempt to regain my balance, I grabbed the nearest thing to me. A fire alarm. FML

#21394235
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28416) - you deserved it (3340)

On 04/15/2015 at 6:12pm - misc - by Drill Drilled - United States (California)

Today, my roommate wants to kick me out because I can't afford to pay my share of the rent this month. I couldn't afford to, because I had to pay for repairs to my car after my roommate got drunk, stole my keys, and crashed it into a street light. FML

#21394027
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36704) - you deserved it (2607)

On 04/15/2015 at 10:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I was called a fascist and accused of being "racist" against poor people, all because some crazy meth-mouthed bitch couldn't afford some booze and expected me to cut the price by almost 40% so she could. FML

#21392314
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27287) - you deserved it (1865)

On 04/12/2015 at 11:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boss fired me by locking me out of my workplace after I went out to throw out the trash. FML

#21391103
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30341) - you deserved it (2139)

On 04/10/2015 at 2:28am - work - by jobless - United States (Colorado)

Today, I overheard a large group of my friends and acquaintances making spontaneous plans to go see a movie that afternoon. I was the only person not invited. Normally I would have believed their excuse that they thought I was "sick at home", except I was sitting a few feet away the entire time. FML

#21390441
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27981) - you deserved it (2356)

On 04/09/2015 at 2:25am - misc - by ifeelsoloved (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to the gun range for a birthday and got shot in the foot by my mom. FML

#21390121
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30032) - you deserved it (3740)

On 04/08/2015 at 5:17pm - misc - by Notre_Dame_714 - United States

Today, my mom called 5 times and I didn't pick up due to being in class at college. I was later called to the front desk, where my mom was crying. She said she was worried about me because I didn't say "I love you" to her after she dropped me off at college. FML

#21387594
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (3624)

On 04/04/2015 at 3:32pm - misc - by gooddaydude (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, the last thing I remember before getting the shit beaten out of me at the bar, was my dipshit brother saying to me, "Dude, I'm not a racist, but" and then ranting about how non-whites should get out of America. FML

#21387285
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27422) - you deserved it (2764)

On 04/03/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was pulled over by a policeman. He thought I was drunk, after doing the "walk in a straight line" test and the "finger-to-nose" test. It wasn't until after I got a fine that I got it through to him that I have cerebellar ataxia, and that I wasn't drunk. FML

#21387213
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27446) - you deserved it (2141)

On 04/03/2015 at 8:42pm - health - by NotDrunk - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom let me know that I'll have to spend my entire tax return on replacing my car brakes. The reason I need new brakes is because almost every single time she uses the car, she floors the gas while the parking brake is still on. FML

Today, I picked up a rock outside and put it in my pocket because it looked cool. A teacher holding the door open stopped me and sent me to the principal. I was confused and asked the teacher why the strict action. She replied that someone has been putting rocks in the toilet. I got a detention. FML

#21386851
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28450) - you deserved it (2514)

On 04/03/2015 at 2:08am - misc - by overreacting - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was let go from my internship for "not putting in enough effort". I was working 50 hours a week for almost zero pay. FML

#21386456
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30597) - you deserved it (2276)

On 04/02/2015 at 10:48am - work - by Wellfu (woman) - Europe



Juliette Bubulle's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Juliette's illustrated FML
  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: