About Jarl_the_Elite : I like PI
Jarl_the_Elite's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Jarl_the_Elite's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/05/2015 at 3:20pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother found out about the psychology exam I have to take tomorrow. Before leaving for her vacation this morning, she grabbed the internet router and took it with her to "get rid of distractions". I have one day to figure out how to access this online exam without Internet. FML
by getting real crafty.. / 07/05/2015 at 11:51am / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a restaurant where the host is an attractive guy with only one arm. I was with my family, so I didn't want to be too obvious when checking him out. It seems like I was, though, because he came over and told me it was rude to stare at his arm. FML
by Anonymous / 07/03/2015 at 9:45pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by but cum to think of it... / 07/03/2015 at 5:29pm / Intimacy
by Deaf / 07/02/2015 at 2:59pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my neighbor yelled at me for driving recklessly. I was going 35 mph, and she was stopped in the middle of a road around a blind curve. My "reckless driving" was slamming on the brakes so I wouldn't hit her. FML
by _whyy_mee / 07/02/2015 at 2:00pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, after replacing several components on my new used car, I realized that the reason it wasn't getting the gas mileage it was supposed to because my coworkers take turns siphoning my gas while I work. FML
by thatshelpful / 07/02/2015 at 12:16am / United States (Iowa) / Transportation
Today, my flight was at the other side of the airport. I ran to the gate, to find that the flight had moved to the other side of the airport. So I ran again to miss my plane by a minute. However I did get a new flight... at the other end of the airport. FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2015 at 3:09pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation
Today, we had a long meeting at work about how we are supposed to feel safe, and to come to the managers if we have any problems. I decided to speak up about a coworker that has been harassing me and several others. My manager laughed at me and walked away. FML
by nevergiveinever / 07/01/2015 at 9:44am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
by alaillama / 06/30/2015 at 6:19pm / United Kingdom (Ealing) / Transportation
by Justincredible69 / 06/29/2015 at 4:29pm / United States / Work
Today, I have the flu, so I called my boss to let him know I couldn't come in today. He told me to think my "lies" through better, and claimed that you can only get the flu during winter. So I guess I'm faking my pale skin, short breath, runny nose, and constant sneezing. FML
by *cough* *cough* you're a dickface / 06/27/2015 at 1:48am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML
by oh no / 06/22/2015 at 4:58pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML
by Iamsosorry / 06/22/2015 at 7:35am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Work
Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen so I went to work. On my walk to work a girl pulls up on my bike and says I need to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. Hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass as police surround me and accuse me of stealing my own bike. FML
by cwell88 / 06/21/2015 at 9:29am / Miscellaneous
- Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without…