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Jameslicious

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Jameslicious

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 5844
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Jameslicious's page activity

Visits<b>doctorhook86</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 10:36am

Jameslicious's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Jameslicious's badges

Jameslicious's favorite FMLs

Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML

#21460430
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17970) - you deserved it (7681)

On 08/25/2015 at 6:10am - misc - by Anon - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was diagnosed with food poisoning for the third time since moving to this base in Japan. My husband keeps cooking questionable meat and vegetables from the commissary because he thinks the food from a Japanese grocery store is radioactive. FML

#21452616
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22004) - you deserved it (1690)

On 08/06/2015 at 4:33am - health - by ithinkimturningjapanese - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)

Today, I learnt the meaning of the phrase "ménage à trois". I had always thought it was synonymous with "fiasco" and have used it several times in essays. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML

#21450109
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16885) - you deserved it (27365)

On 07/31/2015 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after hours of waiting in line, I finally met my favorite band. After posing for a picture, I looked at my phone to find that instead of taking a picture with me and the band, my friend took selfies. FML

Today, I went to the gym to try to get into shape. While I was running on the treadmill, my beer belly pushed against the emergency stop button, twice. FML

#21427019
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25729) - you deserved it (4859)

On 06/16/2015 at 1:27pm - health - by Iarla_ceapaire93 - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I tried to get a piece of glass out of my big toe. After an hour of poking and prodding, I finally got it out only for it to fall on the floor where I couldn't find it. Not five minutes later, I stepped on it again. FML

#21425769
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24683) - you deserved it (6470)

On 06/14/2015 at 2:35am - health - by flipflap (woman) -

Today, an ultrasound tech complimented me on my "exceptionally full bladder". That's probably the best compliment I've received this week. FML

#21424908
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24049) - you deserved it (2217)

On 06/12/2015 at 9:02am - misc - by Jules7594 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was talking to an old man I met at a store. He just wanted to know a few things, and he asked about my day. I explained a few bad things that'd happened, then I thanked him for listening. He then asked, "So, how are we gonna do this?" He thought we were gonna fuck. FML

#21424599
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25879) - you deserved it (2511)

On 06/11/2015 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Montana)

Today, the 4-year-old I was babysitting came up to me all happy, saying she went to the bathroom like a "big girl". Knowing she was just potty trained, I asked if she'd remembered to flush. Looking at me confused, she said, "But it's in my room." FML

#21424205
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26520) - you deserved it (2063)

On 06/10/2015 at 11:04pm - kids - by AdoKitty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss finally did something nice for me and bought me a coffee. By mistake I poured salt in it. To not be ungrateful, I drank it all in front of her. FML

Today, I learned that, when choking on a piece of food, you can cough hard enough to partially prolapse a hemorrhoid. FML

#21362525
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26626) - you deserved it (2359)

On 02/24/2015 at 11:15am - health - by novaguy - United States

Today, I competed in a Tae Kwon Do competition. I came third with my team in the sparring event. My mum said as a joke, "Were there only 3 teams?" There were. FML

#21361215
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29436) - you deserved it (4233)

On 02/22/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by tom28402 - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I had a dream where I whacked my head against my shelf. I woke up immediately after, freaked out and whacked my head against my shelf. FML

#21360941
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29955) - you deserved it (4111)

On 02/22/2015 at 8:54am - health - by IngenuityAbsent - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend got her wisdom teeth removed. I really want to help her out while she recovers, but her swollen cheeks combined with her natural buck teeth keep making me crack up every time I see her. I can't help it and I'm now in the doghouse. FML

#21360286
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22955) - you deserved it (29119)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)



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