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Jameslicious's FML badges
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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Jameslicious's favorite FMLs
Today, on my second morning at college, I tried to make coffee using my Keurig. I realized after I got back from my shower that I hadn't put a cup under the machine. All 3 drawers of my dresser are now filled with coffee. FML
by cullenthegreat / 08/25/2016 at 12:26pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by PeedMaPants / 08/15/2016 at 8:04pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Work
by Bg2466 / 08/14/2016 at 11:17pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, I was practicing for a Cambodian ceremony. I'm American. My fiancée is Cambodian. While doing the practice, I had six people in my face telling me what to do, all at the same time. I got frustrated and accidentally blurted out, "This is fucking retarded." Now the whole family is mad at me. FML
by rcoale1983 / 08/14/2016 at 1:59pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by chewsef / 08/08/2016 at 11:22pm / United States (California) / Money
by FlyingCoffeeMonster / 08/08/2016 at 3:12pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a terrible stomach ache and had some pretty bad gas at work. I tried to head down to the basement for a while to allow my coworkers to continue in peace. About an hour after I came back up, my boss called pest control due to the horrible smell that "must be dead rats". FML
Today, I thought I'd spice things up by kissing my husband on the lips and then working my way down. But about halfway, I got some of his chest hairs lodged in my throat and started gagging. To avoid ruining the mood, I kept going, silently gagging, until we finished. I swallowed the hair. FML
by so unsexy / 08/04/2016 at 5:32pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML
by decenthumanbeing / 07/14/2016 at 9:13am / Money
by Foot In Mouth / 07/12/2016 at 10:46pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work
Today, after 3 days of interrupted sleep, I confronted my new neighbor about the noise his wife keeps making during their "private time". He then let me know the noise is actually from his daughter, who's mentally disabled and isn't taking the move well. FML
by Anonymous / 07/02/2016 at 12:17am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I washed my boyfriend's work clothes, trying to make up for a fight we had earlier. After taking them out, I found his phone, wallet and keys at the bottom of the washer, completly waterlogged. This is not the peace offering I'd hoped for. FML
by bigbagofnope / 06/17/2016 at 4:17pm / United Kingdom / Love
by jack / 06/15/2016 at 5:56am / France (Corse) / Love