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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 31 August 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2378
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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JVVortex's page activity

Visits<b>blackfire20</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:12am<b>dgv</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 8:28am<b>kobolobo</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 9:33pm<b>Richard6036</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:50am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 3:01am<b>CowTippingDwarfs</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 11:54pm<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 2:19pm<b>360noscope</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 10:39am<b>abNormal62</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:32am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 10:38pm<b>ThuNDeY</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:40am<b>thejonac</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:35am<b>tj4234</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 8:10am<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 1:41pm<b>assassinbanana0</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 5:44am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 3:00pm<b>Keeper892</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 9:58am<b>CrAzYELF4</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 12:50pm

Fucked!<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 8:01am<b>assassinbanana0</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 10:44am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 8:00pm<b>kirbs19</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 8:19am

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JVVortex's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were sending dirty messages to each other. We were getting really into it until she replied to one of my messages with, "Oooooh yeah." I read it in the Kool-Aid man's voice and couldn't stop laughing. Mood killed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21710) - you deserved it (4485)

On 11/23/2015 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Stuby14 - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I found out my fiancé is already married when his wife showed up at my door. That's about the same time she found her husband is gay, and that Ashley can be a man's name. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26442) - you deserved it (2390)

On 11/20/2015 at 9:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the bowling alley. I have short, stubby fingers, and as I looked for a bowling ball that would fit my hand properly, an old man watched me searching, and approached asking, "Is that how you are with women? Fingering them, tossing them in the gutter, and looking for another?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (23545) - you deserved it (2881)

On 11/16/2015 at 4:47pm - intimacy - by weldingmachine217 (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my mother-in-law became my boss. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23355) - you deserved it (1757)

On 11/10/2015 at 4:24am - work - by lauziej93 - Spain (La Rioja)

Today, my boyfriend called. He said he would sing me a song, like I'd wanted for a long time. I was excited, but surprised at his song choice. He sang 'Locked Away' by R. City ft. Adam Levine. Turns out, he was calling me from jail. He thought this was romantic, and expected me to bail him out. FML

Today, I told my crush that I liked her a lot. She told me not to message her when I'm drunk. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22378) - you deserved it (2466)

On 10/28/2015 at 1:23am - love - by FreeTacos_ - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up to noises in my living room. I was scared, but I loaded my gun and snuck downstairs. I burst into the living room, yelled for the motherfucker robbing me to put his hands up, and flicked on the light. My cat stared back at me like I was a moron then calmly walked out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22320) - you deserved it (7226)

On 10/24/2015 at 10:47pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25065) - you deserved it (3502)

On 10/23/2015 at 12:05am - work - by Embarrassed ass. (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to the print shop to get some work printed. The guy serving me printed my entire order wrong because he pushed the wrong button, so it had to be done again. He tried to charge me a fine for the mistake he made because "it's not a viable business otherwise". FML


I agree, your life sucks (21932) - you deserved it (1409)

On 10/20/2015 at 10:40am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, while walking home after a night of partying, I saw a thin, bald person in a suit looking at me from across the street. I got flashbacks to the Slender Man, screamed like a little bitch and ran. Then I realized I'd just humiliated myself in front of some random guy waiting for a bus. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14611) - you deserved it (17204)

On 10/08/2015 at 12:04pm - work - by shitbucketsfilledwithshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I watched porn on my phone for the first time and it went black and shut down. In reality my phone just died. But I thought for a few seconds the government found me out. Paranoia much. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19397) - you deserved it (7755)

On 10/03/2015 at 9:38am - misc - by xxx - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents pranked me hard. They spent breakfast messing with my head, all to convince me that I was dreaming. I got so excited at finally having a lucid dream that I ran outside in my pajamas, yelling "Woo-hoo!" and trying to fly. Nothing happened. People saw. FML


I agree, your life sucks (15876) - you deserved it (21596)

On 10/02/2015 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24727) - you deserved it (8545)

On 09/29/2015 at 6:00pm - work - by horp - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to one another. He then did a naked victory lap around his dad's house, blasting Akon's "I Just Had Sex" at full volume. He's legally an adult. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27323) - you deserved it (5284)

On 09/24/2015 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had yet another debilitating migraine that kept me awake. In the middle of the night, I heard an owl hooting. Thinking it was cool, I moved closer to the open window to hear better. After a few minutes, I realized it was actually my new neighbor having loud sex. My aunt moved in next door. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25251) - you deserved it (2024)

On 09/02/2015 at 5:52pm - intimacy - by Hooty (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #20
  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

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